heya all
first time blogging leh, so nervous ! haha -__-
ehs, i dunno wads everyone (xyz) 's impression of me lar, (those who din know me) coz i haven been around for the 1st 3 mths and yea...
so i always mixed around with snr and chinese high ppl lar. den sometimes felt a bit left out also. but i am trying to know more about everyone so da jia, must talk to me, cannot dao ok? =)
anyways, thats enough abt myself le. ningfei always asked me to blog blog blog here. i kinda promised him i will. and i never break any promise i made for him before.
personally, i find the outing veh enjoyable, how bout u guys? at least i talked to some ppl i almost nv talked to. i er.... squeezed with many ppl around a small bbq pit and fan and blow the charcoal and sweat like dunno wad. i made marshmellow for kaiying and...si heng? haha its damn nice right? toldya.
honestly, in terms of actuall bbqing, i think this bbq like quite a failure. but in terms of fun and bonding, its really not bad. i hope everyone enjoyed it as much as i did.
ahem, if yall din notice hor, ningfei was missing for quite a few times. haha... so black alr, go missing at west coast at night, really can find him lar. he haven told me why he moody, i think he will tell me someone ditched him lar. so after i find out who den i'll post it on the blog =D!
hmm, concert is coming, in my opinion, our standard is still far far far far far from making it. so da jia, lets put in a little more effort than we usually do, and plus our unlimited intelligence, we CONFIRM CHOP CHOP BOM BEE BEE can make it for the concert and shock the whole co arena in spore *nod nod*
okay, crapped a lot
hccoxya jia you bah
zhengyou
ps. the url for my own blog is hanamichi-1989.livejournal.com pls do visit!
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Thursday, April 27, 2006
re:hcco outing
woohoo! can finally blog! :D ningfei rox! xian yue rox! hmmm sectional outing! 1)Kbox!! 2)Movie( i think useless1) 3)cycling? 4)fly kites 5) lian pop songs with er hu kk out of point already. i heard that in jurong theres goldkart or wat maybe we can go there n hav fun n bonding? amazing race? thats all my ideas currently :D
ningfei rox! xianyue rox!
Btw, i am ruihong (dreamercrh's crh----> cai ruihong)
ningfei rox! xianyue rox!
Btw, i am ruihong (dreamercrh's crh----> cai ruihong)
hcco outing!!
heyy all!
ok tis sat's outing rite...sectionals we nid to marinate chicken. so yaa i think nid to meet earlier or sth. cos if wwann delicious chicken wings mus let the sauce get thru to the flesh wat. errr haven found ani homes of xy peeps to marinate yet...anione wana volunteer?? we meet around ...12pm? den go nearby ntuc to buy all the stuff...including the other food assigned to us.hm...bring as mani fun things as u wan k like volleyball! soccerball! frisbee! cards!!! anithing tt can play la.yyupp.den go tis guy's house to prepare the food n such...den stay until like 3.30 den chiong to west coast!go there mayb play intersectional captain's cabbage!! hehx thrash the other sections! den bbq n tok cok. at night mayb play sth nice tgther as a co!!
orr u all wana go out to play? like go town or sth.go pool bowl or watever. pls BLOG n giv ur comments these two days. den we try to decide by friday laaa. if not haf to evebodi meet fri morn or sth at canteen n discuss..
okk now its like onli abt 11 or so can make it for aftn outing....the others joining in the night.hmm....i can onli make it for the later half of the sectional outing la...so evethg bai tuo u all le.
seniors are all welcomed to come!! jus giv me a msg k. its hcco bbq outing 4.30 at west coast park...b4 tt sectionals outing xianyue tetantive meet 12 pm yup.
pple pls blog to suggest wat to do for sectional outing !!(bear in mind nid to marinate hor) those who cant make it can oso suggest!! or can suggest which section u all wana "challenge" n wat games to play wif them..i can help arrange wif the sls. hehx :)
ok tis sat's outing rite...sectionals we nid to marinate chicken. so yaa i think nid to meet earlier or sth. cos if wwann delicious chicken wings mus let the sauce get thru to the flesh wat. errr haven found ani homes of xy peeps to marinate yet...anione wana volunteer?? we meet around ...12pm? den go nearby ntuc to buy all the stuff...including the other food assigned to us.hm...bring as mani fun things as u wan k like volleyball! soccerball! frisbee! cards!!! anithing tt can play la.yyupp.den go tis guy's house to prepare the food n such...den stay until like 3.30 den chiong to west coast!go there mayb play intersectional captain's cabbage!! hehx thrash the other sections! den bbq n tok cok. at night mayb play sth nice tgther as a co!!
orr u all wana go out to play? like go town or sth.go pool bowl or watever. pls BLOG n giv ur comments these two days. den we try to decide by friday laaa. if not haf to evebodi meet fri morn or sth at canteen n discuss..
okk now its like onli abt 11 or so can make it for aftn outing....the others joining in the night.hmm....i can onli make it for the later half of the sectional outing la...so evethg bai tuo u all le.
seniors are all welcomed to come!! jus giv me a msg k. its hcco bbq outing 4.30 at west coast park...b4 tt sectionals outing xianyue tetantive meet 12 pm yup.
pple pls blog to suggest wat to do for sectional outing !!(bear in mind nid to marinate hor) those who cant make it can oso suggest!! or can suggest which section u all wana "challenge" n wat games to play wif them..i can help arrange wif the sls. hehx :)
Sunday, April 23, 2006
haizz. tan qi.
heyy. i realised i haf abandoned tis blog for long alr.
nowadays cooped up wif own stuff, duno wat others are doing. den when u go out of ur world, so mani things have changed.
i walked past the lib com last fri, den i rmb the past time when i used to rush there aft lesns to post on this blog! hehx. so carefree la those days.
how's everyone doing? everyone tt stil bothers about this blog. life mus be damn tough for the j2s, esp those wif responsibilities anywhere..j2 life simply = hell. eveone has his or her own probs, its universal lo..or rather, unisingaporeal.
i think the ans to alot of probs, can be found around us, n not within. tts y i always believe in a team.
if all of us open our eyes big, how much more would we see?
but, will tt be of ani help? will things change more than they are alr?
or, mayb its simply wise jus to be simple.jus to close ur eyes, n sleep. mayb den, the ans would be found instead?
jus tokked wif a fellow huang cheng buddy about this thing called "friendship". he says if frens dun keep in contact, their frenship would be left wif....wat? they were once best frens in jc, but 30 years later when they meet, wat? wat will happen?
i say no. frenship would stretch over the length,breadth,width dimensions. frenship would even stretch over time. i believe one day, tt when evethg is made simple in this world, mayb we would all c tt.
its jus sad tt passion is not popular nowadays. or isit sad tt pop culture thrives nowadays? or issit sad tt passion would be introduced to us so early in our life? mayb to some it has alr lived its purpose n died down? its amazing how human creatures create things so complicated in this world.its even more amazing how their descendants follow blindly to the conventional.but i think, in everyone of us, there stil remains tt key to our real nature, n once we unlock it, wat will happen?
wat will happen?
like i said, answers are to be found outside.
the coming month, will be tough for the pple in other jc co. so mani concerts.i even haf to wonder whether i shld cut down my eating expenses jus to save up for all the concerts.y i go so mani concerts? to me, concerts are results of hard work, from diff pple. diff pple come tgther ...n make miracles. it would be a pity for one to miss these miracles...in a concert, the hard work behind all of it would be buried by time, the listener onli gets to appreciate the whole packaged product, the music.i think, one mus learn to listen carefully, bcos wats impt is not the music played on stage, but tt which is sounded backstage...
jia you to all who's working hard for concert preparation....n yup, do wat u believe in, u nv noe, scolding is a bitter medicine....:)
nominations coming up for hcco....i wonder, will things change? or will pple jus care about tests n exams, as they will usually put in priority in life?usual things are not done by norm pple, tts y i find myself so out-of-place.haha.hmm...j1s seem not to noe each other at all, except within sections? hard to blame, onli 4 months tgther, some onli 1 month....but the impt thing is, how much haf u rmb? how mani faces haf u rmb?
sometimes its hard not to give up. a pat on the shoulder, a word from the heart will erase one thousand tots tt u originally haf.those who haf decided to stay on....mus stay on.i wouldnt say its a duty, but, its a choice. n isnt tt wat mkes life interesting?
hcco gg to haf BBQ outing tis sat 29 april at east coast!!! all mus come !!! a v v rare oppor. for eveone to go out tgther n relax for one day. who's gonna bring wat, who's gonna play wat, who's gonna do wat, haha...all to be look forward to!! seniors!! come back join us??!can serve as a gathering for u all n oso get to noe ur cute cute juniors in hccoxyz '06! got tt short short one, big big one, siao siao one....total 12 v cute xiao didi xiao meimei!
it has been quite long since i picked up tt "slogan" : xianyue rox!. budden, i wana pick it up again. altho so mani hands forced tt hand down so mani times, i dun care!! i wana raise up my hand again!! :) :) :) three smileys. whee~~~~!
let bygones be bygones. well said. duno who said tt...someone enlighten me!!
AND, if anione is stil wondering, in order to cater to the needs of the exciting hcco concert '06, xianyue tshirt,chalet,pullover n watever else all haf to be dropped for a while! we jus haf to pull through it, jus this six weeks!
hope. difference of one individual in a co.....well said, bong.
haizz.how come everytime i post, is this kind of post de.dotz.think i shld sleep more.erase more stuff in my mind.
n yup, do wat u believe in..
nowadays cooped up wif own stuff, duno wat others are doing. den when u go out of ur world, so mani things have changed.
i walked past the lib com last fri, den i rmb the past time when i used to rush there aft lesns to post on this blog! hehx. so carefree la those days.
how's everyone doing? everyone tt stil bothers about this blog. life mus be damn tough for the j2s, esp those wif responsibilities anywhere..j2 life simply = hell. eveone has his or her own probs, its universal lo..or rather, unisingaporeal.
i think the ans to alot of probs, can be found around us, n not within. tts y i always believe in a team.
if all of us open our eyes big, how much more would we see?
but, will tt be of ani help? will things change more than they are alr?
or, mayb its simply wise jus to be simple.jus to close ur eyes, n sleep. mayb den, the ans would be found instead?
jus tokked wif a fellow huang cheng buddy about this thing called "friendship". he says if frens dun keep in contact, their frenship would be left wif....wat? they were once best frens in jc, but 30 years later when they meet, wat? wat will happen?
i say no. frenship would stretch over the length,breadth,width dimensions. frenship would even stretch over time. i believe one day, tt when evethg is made simple in this world, mayb we would all c tt.
its jus sad tt passion is not popular nowadays. or isit sad tt pop culture thrives nowadays? or issit sad tt passion would be introduced to us so early in our life? mayb to some it has alr lived its purpose n died down? its amazing how human creatures create things so complicated in this world.its even more amazing how their descendants follow blindly to the conventional.but i think, in everyone of us, there stil remains tt key to our real nature, n once we unlock it, wat will happen?
wat will happen?
like i said, answers are to be found outside.
the coming month, will be tough for the pple in other jc co. so mani concerts.i even haf to wonder whether i shld cut down my eating expenses jus to save up for all the concerts.y i go so mani concerts? to me, concerts are results of hard work, from diff pple. diff pple come tgther ...n make miracles. it would be a pity for one to miss these miracles...in a concert, the hard work behind all of it would be buried by time, the listener onli gets to appreciate the whole packaged product, the music.i think, one mus learn to listen carefully, bcos wats impt is not the music played on stage, but tt which is sounded backstage...
jia you to all who's working hard for concert preparation....n yup, do wat u believe in, u nv noe, scolding is a bitter medicine....:)
nominations coming up for hcco....i wonder, will things change? or will pple jus care about tests n exams, as they will usually put in priority in life?usual things are not done by norm pple, tts y i find myself so out-of-place.haha.hmm...j1s seem not to noe each other at all, except within sections? hard to blame, onli 4 months tgther, some onli 1 month....but the impt thing is, how much haf u rmb? how mani faces haf u rmb?
sometimes its hard not to give up. a pat on the shoulder, a word from the heart will erase one thousand tots tt u originally haf.those who haf decided to stay on....mus stay on.i wouldnt say its a duty, but, its a choice. n isnt tt wat mkes life interesting?
hcco gg to haf BBQ outing tis sat 29 april at east coast!!! all mus come !!! a v v rare oppor. for eveone to go out tgther n relax for one day. who's gonna bring wat, who's gonna play wat, who's gonna do wat, haha...all to be look forward to!! seniors!! come back join us??!can serve as a gathering for u all n oso get to noe ur cute cute juniors in hccoxyz '06! got tt short short one, big big one, siao siao one....total 12 v cute xiao didi xiao meimei!
it has been quite long since i picked up tt "slogan" : xianyue rox!. budden, i wana pick it up again. altho so mani hands forced tt hand down so mani times, i dun care!! i wana raise up my hand again!! :) :) :) three smileys. whee~~~~!
let bygones be bygones. well said. duno who said tt...someone enlighten me!!
AND, if anione is stil wondering, in order to cater to the needs of the exciting hcco concert '06, xianyue tshirt,chalet,pullover n watever else all haf to be dropped for a while! we jus haf to pull through it, jus this six weeks!
hope. difference of one individual in a co.....well said, bong.
haizz.how come everytime i post, is this kind of post de.dotz.think i shld sleep more.erase more stuff in my mind.
n yup, do wat u believe in..
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Yo!
How have you guys been? I guess it's quite some time since I last saw you guys. Especially the J1s, hope you guys have lots of fun in both CO and HC herself. Then to the J2s, block test is over for quite some time already right? Hope you all have met your expectations and even if you have not, just keep trying. =P
Hmm...How's the concert preparation so far? Must 马不停蹄地 practise ok, because it's like only just last than 10 weeks to June 4th(Opps, I shouldn't remind you guys that). I really look forward to the performance, and see you guys showcasing yourself on stage. =)
Anyway, in case you guys don't know, I'm at Nee Soon Camp now training to be a professional medic(or otherwise known as Level 1 Paramedic). Life there is quite good and there's quite a lot of free time to spare at night, just that there's hell lots of biology stuff to study and memorise(grr..I hate memorising things). And the highlight there is that I get to have a weekly poking session on other people using a yakault straw size needle(though I get poked myself too). Honestly, if you are sadistic enough, it's quite fun actually(opps!). So now I know one more way to poke people, other than using fingers(so you better don't provoke me). Xp Perhaps, next time if CO have any events, I can be the standby first aider in the event. Xp Or perhaps you get to see me in action on TV during NDP or some overseas missions(even better than doing OCIP =P).
K, I guess it's time for me to log off. Take care guys!
~An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but would you want to eat the apple if the doctor is very chio?~
-DY
Hmm...How's the concert preparation so far? Must 马不停蹄地 practise ok, because it's like only just last than 10 weeks to June 4th(Opps, I shouldn't remind you guys that). I really look forward to the performance, and see you guys showcasing yourself on stage. =)
Anyway, in case you guys don't know, I'm at Nee Soon Camp now training to be a professional medic(or otherwise known as Level 1 Paramedic). Life there is quite good and there's quite a lot of free time to spare at night, just that there's hell lots of biology stuff to study and memorise(grr..I hate memorising things). And the highlight there is that I get to have a weekly poking session on other people using a yakault straw size needle(though I get poked myself too). Honestly, if you are sadistic enough, it's quite fun actually(opps!). So now I know one more way to poke people, other than using fingers(so you better don't provoke me). Xp Perhaps, next time if CO have any events, I can be the standby first aider in the event. Xp Or perhaps you get to see me in action on TV during NDP or some overseas missions(even better than doing OCIP =P).
K, I guess it's time for me to log off. Take care guys!
~An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but would you want to eat the apple if the doctor is very chio?~
-DY
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
hey juniors! i'm back to blog again! anyway.. juz 2 more months to concert.. so everyone must jiayou k? and also, j1s ar... muz listen to nf and other seniors k.. muz guai guai and dun be too noisy!!! and j2s=) muz show gd eg to our little juniors.. heard tt u all have not decide on a xianyue xiaozhu piece for concert.. perhaps u all can have a discussion, do some research (like nf) and make some suggestions? everyone has a part to play!! i'm so looking forward to the concert.. i'm sure u all will do a great job..
hahaz... update u all on my life... i'm still working at s'pore poly... but gg to end soon... so i'll be jobless soon=( boohoohoo... hahaz..
all the best in the concert preparation!
and if xianyue got any outings must rmb to tell me wo...
cya guys=)
~lixiang
hahaz... update u all on my life... i'm still working at s'pore poly... but gg to end soon... so i'll be jobless soon=( boohoohoo... hahaz..
all the best in the concert preparation!
and if xianyue got any outings must rmb to tell me wo...
cya guys=)
~lixiang
hey juniors! i'm back to blog again! anyway.. juz 2 more months to concert.. so everyone must jiayou k? and also, j1s ar... muz listen to nf and other seniors k.. muz guai guai and dun be too noisy!!! and j2s=) muz show gd eg to our little juniors.. heard tt u all have not decide on a xianyue xiaozhu piece for concert.. perhaps u all can have a discussion, do some research (like nf) and make some suggestions? everyone has a part to play!! i'm so looking forward to the concert.. i'm sure u all will do a great job..
hahaz... update u all on my life... i'm still working at s'pore poly... but gg to end soon... so i'll be jobless soon=( boohoohoo... hahaz..
all the best in the concert preparation!
and if xianyue got any outings must rmb to tell me wo...
cya guys=)
~lixiang
hahaz... update u all on my life... i'm still working at s'pore poly... but gg to end soon... so i'll be jobless soon=( boohoohoo... hahaz..
all the best in the concert preparation!
and if xianyue got any outings must rmb to tell me wo...
cya guys=)
~lixiang
Friday, March 31, 2006
calling everyone!!!
heyyyyyyyyyyy alllll!~
time to blog la!!
its like, 8 weeks to the concert lo. dun tell me noothing to blog k. cos u MUST haf something to bitch about the j2s rite? den j2s mus haf sth to gossip abt the j1s rite?
ehh. wat abt ur hopes for xianyue? like.....tshirt?! chalet?! fun!!!
actually, wanted to tell u all sth la.budden, u all always no one time where everybodi is present. got hell lots of stuffs for xianyue....but its ultimately up to u all to make the miracles!
i don expect many of u to feel or know anithing at tis time tho. it takes time.
mayb i will haf more stuffs to tok about AFTER i tell u all my plans.
for now, hectic season for HCCO. some will get real stressed up...so dun be surprised to c conflicts arising btw pple. i say this in advance la, cos now pple stil sleeping....
time to wake up! 9 more weeks to concert, 28 pracs!!! we still haf alot alot to go thru...so, enjoy ur time here! smile more in xiaozu k! like this :))) trust me, 9 weeks is v fast, by the time the concert comes, u will wonder how much more u can do as a team like xianyue now...frm wat i c, xianyue's structure is there now, jus nid more active participation from ur side....ahhh...will tok to u all la.
the pple who joined later, zhengyou, sylvia, sutyee, kaili, mus jiayou k! dun giv up so easily! ur hard work will be worth it...
the j2s, can c u all enthusiasm so low compared to last year.....cmon! show the juniors wat xianyue was like last year!! the outings..stayovers..qing gong yan..arts fest..showcase..sooo mani things to look back on....
the chi high n ny j1s tt joined earlier, 8 of u..take note of ur attitude n behaviour k. im afraid the coming weeks wont tolerate so much noisy n rude behaviour le...i oso dun wana c wei laoshi scolding u all in front of the whole co. so yup, dun overdo it.
and, pple please give bong ur fullest support k, u don noe how much he haf to handle in this period.
and, i haf one word to say to all of u, but i shant say it here la.
the last 9 weeks!!! its time to chiong!
time to blog la!!
its like, 8 weeks to the concert lo. dun tell me noothing to blog k. cos u MUST haf something to bitch about the j2s rite? den j2s mus haf sth to gossip abt the j1s rite?
ehh. wat abt ur hopes for xianyue? like.....tshirt?! chalet?! fun!!!
actually, wanted to tell u all sth la.budden, u all always no one time where everybodi is present. got hell lots of stuffs for xianyue....but its ultimately up to u all to make the miracles!
i don expect many of u to feel or know anithing at tis time tho. it takes time.
mayb i will haf more stuffs to tok about AFTER i tell u all my plans.
for now, hectic season for HCCO. some will get real stressed up...so dun be surprised to c conflicts arising btw pple. i say this in advance la, cos now pple stil sleeping....
time to wake up! 9 more weeks to concert, 28 pracs!!! we still haf alot alot to go thru...so, enjoy ur time here! smile more in xiaozu k! like this :))) trust me, 9 weeks is v fast, by the time the concert comes, u will wonder how much more u can do as a team like xianyue now...frm wat i c, xianyue's structure is there now, jus nid more active participation from ur side....ahhh...will tok to u all la.
the pple who joined later, zhengyou, sylvia, sutyee, kaili, mus jiayou k! dun giv up so easily! ur hard work will be worth it...
the j2s, can c u all enthusiasm so low compared to last year.....cmon! show the juniors wat xianyue was like last year!! the outings..stayovers..qing gong yan..arts fest..showcase..sooo mani things to look back on....
the chi high n ny j1s tt joined earlier, 8 of u..take note of ur attitude n behaviour k. im afraid the coming weeks wont tolerate so much noisy n rude behaviour le...i oso dun wana c wei laoshi scolding u all in front of the whole co. so yup, dun overdo it.
and, pple please give bong ur fullest support k, u don noe how much he haf to handle in this period.
and, i haf one word to say to all of u, but i shant say it here la.
the last 9 weeks!!! its time to chiong!
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Monday, March 13, 2006
First March holiday practice
The hols are here again!
For some, its gonna be a period of fun
For some, its gonna be a period of mugging
For some, its gonna be a period of stoning
For some, its gonna be a period of slacking and rotting
For some, its gonna be a period of fun, mugging, stoning, slacking and rotting and... the rest is up for you to fill in the blanks.
but rule of thumb: Time and Tide waits for no man, so let us all be woman?! no la of course.. ok la remain what you are and make use of time wisely.
So todae is the first holiday CO practice.. and YAY xianyue is once again praised. ok la... only a bit la... to be humble. =P Altho attendance todae was quite good... we would expect more to come this wednesday.. coz huang cheng is FINALLY over. so we can expect sylvia and zhengyou to come this wednesday le. overall, xiao zu and da zu was smooth we juz played erhu... ate mentos and folded stars haha.
Actually got nothing to write really... i am juz crapping things out of my mind. nevertheless, my wish is to see more posts... whether crap, serious stuff, cold jokes anything, gossip or you just want to exercise your hands by typing words. but first... we need the contact list!! NF!! haha. we noe u are bz la... but maybe we can help in making it? yea.. i wld be glad to.
so the block test is up next wk for the J2s, these is dedicated to them:
Mug hard... but muz also play hard..
But do aviod these:
coz u all have our support!
Have a fruitful week ahead.
For some, its gonna be a period of fun
For some, its gonna be a period of mugging
For some, its gonna be a period of stoning
For some, its gonna be a period of slacking and rotting
For some, its gonna be a period of fun, mugging, stoning, slacking and rotting and... the rest is up for you to fill in the blanks.
but rule of thumb: Time and Tide waits for no man, so let us all be woman?! no la of course.. ok la remain what you are and make use of time wisely.
So todae is the first holiday CO practice.. and YAY xianyue is once again praised. ok la... only a bit la... to be humble. =P Altho attendance todae was quite good... we would expect more to come this wednesday.. coz huang cheng is FINALLY over. so we can expect sylvia and zhengyou to come this wednesday le. overall, xiao zu and da zu was smooth we juz played erhu... ate mentos and folded stars haha.
Actually got nothing to write really... i am juz crapping things out of my mind. nevertheless, my wish is to see more posts... whether crap, serious stuff, cold jokes anything, gossip or you just want to exercise your hands by typing words. but first... we need the contact list!! NF!! haha. we noe u are bz la... but maybe we can help in making it? yea.. i wld be glad to.
so the block test is up next wk for the J2s, these is dedicated to them:
Mug hard... but muz also play hard..
But do aviod these:
coz u all have our support!
Have a fruitful week ahead.
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Hello all! this is my first ever blog and i am the first J1 junior to post Yay:) (applause). haha so pardon me if it is very sian.. =) actually have nothing to post one but saw that sharon wanted someone to write about the reunion... so this is my personal account:
Firstly, hcco reuinion dinner was held at marina bay (steamboat buffet) - - a hcico tradition. although very sian alr after eating there for four years, it is still cheap and you can play bowling/pool/arcade there. The only thing is that it gets vv oily when you eat. to give an analogy: after you have your meal there, the oil on your face can be literally used to fry an egg! (lol lame). and occasionally, you can get aluminium foils burning and a nice campfire.
so on the 18th of Febuary, 4:58 p.m. (rainy). me and kaiying was there at the marina bay mrt (we happened to take the same train.. coincidentally). we were supposed to be there at 5 p.m. SHARP... but in the end only saw bong alone... at the ulu coner of the mrt station reading his comic book. some people had huang cheng, some had the chinese quiz competition thingy. so by 5:25, only about 10 ++ people came including DY and another J3 senior.. we tok and tok until 6 something then set of to the steamboat area. Here comes the extraordinary part... we missed the bus service 400 and after about 5 minutes, another one came. this is the first time in my entire life that i encountered this... usu. the frequency of the buss 400 is like 20 min to 40 min lar. so that day damn lucky... dun need to hear those old man and auntie 'begging' you to go and eat their steamboat at the bus stop. (so irritating)
When we reached to place, we were lucky to meet wan qing's (from rgco and hwa chong) mum there... she works at the place where we had our dinner. btw, she managed to recognise us because hongfei was wearing the hwa chong uniform and few of us were carrying erhu. although we do not know her daughter, i acted as if i noe like that... then asked her for discount. =P but not bad la... at least i made her promise us to give us freeflow ice cream after dinner..
Then came the eating part... in the end only 25 people were present coz many people were busy... we barely filled two rows for table which was quite pathetic la. nothing interesting happened except that shupeng was gorging down tons of prawns... until the prawn shells filled the table - at least for his portion of the table. (quite er xin actually). Oh ya... and hongfei was sick and he could not eat all the fried stuff except on some soup thingy and fried noodles which he claimed disgusting. haha nice way to spend the 10 bucks for the dinner. but so good of him to accompany us for the dinner after his chinese quiz competition although he could not eat most of the things. we also had a small fire in the other table and sang a birthday song lar. Other than that... we just ate and toked..
After dinner was pool time... more people came after our dinner becoz they had finished their huang cheng practice. neway.. there were only some pros in the pool like shouhao, hongfei and WENQI. the rest of us all noobs but nevertheless, we played for about one hour. and damn farnie lar... shupeng claimed himself pro but in the end make so many blunders... it was only towards the end then he regained his powers (or consiousness?). His reason: My mind was too preoccupied with 'SOMETHING ELSE'.
five of us took lionels van (those for transporting goods) home. we squeezed into the back of the van and it reminded me of those 'gangster van' where when you walk along the street at night... a horst of gangster carrying poles stop along the pavement and rush out through the sliding door of the van to 'hoot' people. then they would escape by the van. The difference: we are not gangsters.
so thats the review.. hope you like it... eh my first post lohs
btw we din get freeflow ice cream.. the auntie gave us 25 coupons to collect the ice cream. (Cheh....)
this photo was taken from my class blog... quite funny :)
Firstly, hcco reuinion dinner was held at marina bay (steamboat buffet) - - a hcico tradition. although very sian alr after eating there for four years, it is still cheap and you can play bowling/pool/arcade there. The only thing is that it gets vv oily when you eat. to give an analogy: after you have your meal there, the oil on your face can be literally used to fry an egg! (lol lame). and occasionally, you can get aluminium foils burning and a nice campfire.
so on the 18th of Febuary, 4:58 p.m. (rainy). me and kaiying was there at the marina bay mrt (we happened to take the same train.. coincidentally). we were supposed to be there at 5 p.m. SHARP... but in the end only saw bong alone... at the ulu coner of the mrt station reading his comic book. some people had huang cheng, some had the chinese quiz competition thingy. so by 5:25, only about 10 ++ people came including DY and another J3 senior.. we tok and tok until 6 something then set of to the steamboat area. Here comes the extraordinary part... we missed the bus service 400 and after about 5 minutes, another one came. this is the first time in my entire life that i encountered this... usu. the frequency of the buss 400 is like 20 min to 40 min lar. so that day damn lucky... dun need to hear those old man and auntie 'begging' you to go and eat their steamboat at the bus stop. (so irritating)
When we reached to place, we were lucky to meet wan qing's (from rgco and hwa chong) mum there... she works at the place where we had our dinner. btw, she managed to recognise us because hongfei was wearing the hwa chong uniform and few of us were carrying erhu. although we do not know her daughter, i acted as if i noe like that... then asked her for discount. =P but not bad la... at least i made her promise us to give us freeflow ice cream after dinner..
Then came the eating part... in the end only 25 people were present coz many people were busy... we barely filled two rows for table which was quite pathetic la. nothing interesting happened except that shupeng was gorging down tons of prawns... until the prawn shells filled the table - at least for his portion of the table. (quite er xin actually). Oh ya... and hongfei was sick and he could not eat all the fried stuff except on some soup thingy and fried noodles which he claimed disgusting. haha nice way to spend the 10 bucks for the dinner. but so good of him to accompany us for the dinner after his chinese quiz competition although he could not eat most of the things. we also had a small fire in the other table and sang a birthday song lar. Other than that... we just ate and toked..
After dinner was pool time... more people came after our dinner becoz they had finished their huang cheng practice. neway.. there were only some pros in the pool like shouhao, hongfei and WENQI. the rest of us all noobs but nevertheless, we played for about one hour. and damn farnie lar... shupeng claimed himself pro but in the end make so many blunders... it was only towards the end then he regained his powers (or consiousness?). His reason: My mind was too preoccupied with 'SOMETHING ELSE'.
five of us took lionels van (those for transporting goods) home. we squeezed into the back of the van and it reminded me of those 'gangster van' where when you walk along the street at night... a horst of gangster carrying poles stop along the pavement and rush out through the sliding door of the van to 'hoot' people. then they would escape by the van. The difference: we are not gangsters.
so thats the review.. hope you like it... eh my first post lohs
btw we din get freeflow ice cream.. the auntie gave us 25 coupons to collect the ice cream. (Cheh....)
this photo was taken from my class blog... quite funny :)
Sunday, February 05, 2006
.....
hahhaha! din noe jin guan will write tt post leh. hah cip perf rox la altho nobody hear u there. like we la until siao oso no use. BUDDEN, its an exp for us! n good that we can play tgther as a team la.
huh i tot liyu always speak english one??? tok cok la jin guan
n miss quek blogged! hahaa. so funny la c u in school as a teacher. like last year we were all playing at sentosa laaaa. den suddenly u become a teacher! haha crap. ok niwae u say one ar, u mus come frequently ok, come teach the juniors n dai them bla bla bla, since eveday u coming hwa chong alr.
tt long teng was the worst ever long teng i conducted la. i think its my fault niwae. not enuff sleep give all the wrong cues. sorry hcco!
lixiang oso bloggedd!! long time no c man! realli la mus come back k. esp when reunion dinner is coming up! yes! annual reunion dinner evebodi mus come back hor!! tentative is fri nite, but i dunno if the army guys can make it leh. will confirm soon.....
dayang seems to be having fun in army....hehx. tt time he came back i was shocked! cos he looked tan n muscular.haha....n quite shuai somemore! (dayang leh :) ) yea forever enthu one come back showoff his muscle. heheh, do come back often!
erp. hcco exco jus had a long n serious tok last weds. i hope evething is gg to improve n be ok in the future. for xianyue, minyi's gg to be in charge if im not around, so yup mus listen to her k (oso mus listen to me hor). n i hate to say this, but huang cheng is taking up alot of my time, so outings n such, i can onli TRY to organise bahh...but aft the first block test, lets haf more outings n play n fun!
looking forward to reunion dinner...hope it will be as fun as qing gong yan last year!!!
huh i tot liyu always speak english one??? tok cok la jin guan
n miss quek blogged! hahaa. so funny la c u in school as a teacher. like last year we were all playing at sentosa laaaa. den suddenly u become a teacher! haha crap. ok niwae u say one ar, u mus come frequently ok, come teach the juniors n dai them bla bla bla, since eveday u coming hwa chong alr.
tt long teng was the worst ever long teng i conducted la. i think its my fault niwae. not enuff sleep give all the wrong cues. sorry hcco!
lixiang oso bloggedd!! long time no c man! realli la mus come back k. esp when reunion dinner is coming up! yes! annual reunion dinner evebodi mus come back hor!! tentative is fri nite, but i dunno if the army guys can make it leh. will confirm soon.....
dayang seems to be having fun in army....hehx. tt time he came back i was shocked! cos he looked tan n muscular.haha....n quite shuai somemore! (dayang leh :) ) yea forever enthu one come back showoff his muscle. heheh, do come back often!
erp. hcco exco jus had a long n serious tok last weds. i hope evething is gg to improve n be ok in the future. for xianyue, minyi's gg to be in charge if im not around, so yup mus listen to her k (oso mus listen to me hor). n i hate to say this, but huang cheng is taking up alot of my time, so outings n such, i can onli TRY to organise bahh...but aft the first block test, lets haf more outings n play n fun!
looking forward to reunion dinner...hope it will be as fun as qing gong yan last year!!!
Thursday, February 02, 2006
hi everyone!
hi pple!! boon shan here!!! havent blogged in a long time.. *guilty*..so here i am! firstly, updates about myself! as many of you all know (esp the j2s and j1s this year), im relief teaching chem in hc now..for 5 months until end of may..yupz..that is if i dont get horrible A level results and decide to quit because i have no face to return...cant say much about work here, coz some j1s in xian yue this year know me as "miss quek"..so i better not reveal too much..but all i will say is that it has been pretty fun so far, though not without stress and problems..especially when some of the students are like the same age as me and it's the first time im teaching, so i dont really know if im doing fine..and it's quite hard to maintain a balance between being strict and approachable..
went back to see the CO pple for CNY celebrations!! looks like CO intake this year is quite good, especially for dizi and cello..though xian yue seems a bit overwhelmed with chi high and NY pple..im not saying that they are not welcome or good, just that more variety will be nice! like our batch..let's see..we have pple from rgs, dunman high, maris stella (wu han am i right?), cck (dayang?), ny, chi high..did i miss anyone out? i thought it was fun meeting new pple! anyway..long teng for CNY was erm..quite ok for last min work..but but but...please dont do this for the concert in june!! juniors! must work hard and put up a good show k? looking forward to watching the concert!! j3s must come and support too!
Looking forward to an outing soon! meanwhile, take care everyone! :)
ps: ning fei..dont be too stressed..can always come and find me if u really need someone to help with practices..i'll go and 'glare' at them play..haha..
went back to see the CO pple for CNY celebrations!! looks like CO intake this year is quite good, especially for dizi and cello..though xian yue seems a bit overwhelmed with chi high and NY pple..im not saying that they are not welcome or good, just that more variety will be nice! like our batch..let's see..we have pple from rgs, dunman high, maris stella (wu han am i right?), cck (dayang?), ny, chi high..did i miss anyone out? i thought it was fun meeting new pple! anyway..long teng for CNY was erm..quite ok for last min work..but but but...please dont do this for the concert in june!! juniors! must work hard and put up a good show k? looking forward to watching the concert!! j3s must come and support too!
Looking forward to an outing soon! meanwhile, take care everyone! :)
ps: ning fei..dont be too stressed..can always come and find me if u really need someone to help with practices..i'll go and 'glare' at them play..haha..
It's me again!
Yo! I am here to blog again! =D Hmm...It feels really great to meet up with you guys in school yesterday and to see that HCCO is growing again!
Anyway, I'm only another month left before I can get out of Tekong, unless I get posted back to Tekong that is. Not saying that being in Tekong is horrible, with the funny superiors and the fantastic platoon mates I have and the beautiful sea view from my bunk; just that the outside world is always better. 外头的月亮总是比较园嘛。
Anyway, my 7 days fieldcamp was over already, so the coming month should not be that hectic anymore. But still, things will get quite dangerous with all the live weapons and whatsoever.
Am-Bush!
My section mates! And below us is the chest level deep hole that we have dug. We call that the trench I think? lolx...
Anyway, I'm only another month left before I can get out of Tekong, unless I get posted back to Tekong that is. Not saying that being in Tekong is horrible, with the funny superiors and the fantastic platoon mates I have and the beautiful sea view from my bunk; just that the outside world is always better. 外头的月亮总是比较园嘛。
Anyway, my 7 days fieldcamp was over already, so the coming month should not be that hectic anymore. But still, things will get quite dangerous with all the live weapons and whatsoever.
Am-Bush!
My section mates! And below us is the chest level deep hole that we have dug. We call that the trench I think? lolx...
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
come on, everyone!
its great to see some life on OUR blog.. so i'm gg to contribute... since its OUR blog, everyone including me, blog more!!=P
anyway.. gd tt ning fei is not dead.. hahaz.. its hard to cope with 2 ccas and sch work.. so jiayou ar!! dun because of huangcheng then neglect co k?? (hahaz.. i noe u wun...dun neglect sch work oso) the rest of u muz help him wo.. cannot slack coz he not ard k?? and yupz.. i wan outing!!! how abt ice-skating?? can go on weekends when the guys book out.. how's tt?? better go for outing soon.. or else when i get my results, i may be too sad to go out le.. HAHA... ok update u ppl on wat i'm doing now! if not u all think i'm dead too=P i'm working in s'pore poly now.. juz some admin work.. so sian rite? not like liyu, so exciting.. hahaz..
cny coming.. u all busy preparing? perform well on fri=) and enjoy urselves..
come on, be more enthu=) make this blog more alive...i wanna see a bunch of enthu juniors, not half-dead juniors k??? last yr, i was veri impressed and in fact envious tt ur batch was so on and fun... so i think u'll have no prob in being enthu this yr rite? hahaz.. outing hor, anyone can organise one, doesn't need to be ningfei.. even j1 can organise! (do j1s read this blog?) so someone pls organise!!! hope to see u all soon.. hahaz..
~lixiang
anyway.. gd tt ning fei is not dead.. hahaz.. its hard to cope with 2 ccas and sch work.. so jiayou ar!! dun because of huangcheng then neglect co k?? (hahaz.. i noe u wun...dun neglect sch work oso) the rest of u muz help him wo.. cannot slack coz he not ard k?? and yupz.. i wan outing!!! how abt ice-skating?? can go on weekends when the guys book out.. how's tt?? better go for outing soon.. or else when i get my results, i may be too sad to go out le.. HAHA... ok update u ppl on wat i'm doing now! if not u all think i'm dead too=P i'm working in s'pore poly now.. juz some admin work.. so sian rite? not like liyu, so exciting.. hahaz..
cny coming.. u all busy preparing? perform well on fri=) and enjoy urselves..
come on, be more enthu=) make this blog more alive...i wanna see a bunch of enthu juniors, not half-dead juniors k??? last yr, i was veri impressed and in fact envious tt ur batch was so on and fun... so i think u'll have no prob in being enthu this yr rite? hahaz.. outing hor, anyone can organise one, doesn't need to be ningfei.. even j1 can organise! (do j1s read this blog?) so someone pls organise!!! hope to see u all soon.. hahaz..
~lixiang
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
heyy
heyy evebodi! its a new year so lets get happy! ahhhh haven reali welcomed the j1s till now, like no official event to commenmerate their joining of hcco!
oook. shant deny it evebodi is darn busy nowadays, esp e j2s la. wif all the s papers n studies n such. ya but dun forget this blog!!! sori ar liyu actually me oso v busy so ya tend to let things off my mind. cant believe half year b4 eveone is so enthu but now...err...
ok. xianyue isnt gona go on like this! not wif ani like real outings wif the juniors, or wif so boring a dazu as i haf witnessed today! wif the coming of the juniors....lets all put all the bad stuffs behind us in year 2005 n move on to 2006! (altho i myself oso noe tts hard). but we will all try la, wouldnt we?? hm. will haf a small pek tok wif the j1s this wednesday xiaozu, strictly for j1 xianyue onli. so ya will try to make evething transparent there for all to see us xianyue.
yea ever since ....lemme think. the minyi's stayover? THERE HAVE BEEN NO OUTINGS!! omg i think enqi n fel haven even come for ani outings yet!!! where have the spirit gone??? actually i oso ask myself la. but ...ya...evebodi too busy....
er. in reply to liyu's "how's evebodi's life now?" ques, ok i mus say i will damn bz tis 3 months cos of huang cheng! joined back doing cui chang work, haf to stay up quite late eveday. yupz, so tts the reason i haven been planning anithing for co YET...ya haf to go back to help cos huang cheng wil oways be part of me. niwae, i oso dun wana lose my other half which is CO, soooooo, trying to cope both CCAs now. u j1s out there, dun think can pon when im not around during xiaozu hor, i haf eyes evewhere hehe. niwae besides this two cca i haf the dreaded tons of studies n homework to do finish! n i think im worst out of all the xianyue j2 peeps la...cos i kind of slacked thruout j1. so ya. now ALL the teachers chasing aft me....damn. soooo, er, haf to admit quite stressed. AND besides these, haf to do some other stuff too. so...basically = NO TIME!!
of cos la. i put huang cheng n CO (xianyue first) at the top of prioritiees, so as i said, look forward for more outings or watsoever!!! Ning Fei haven die ok!
hope to c more entries coming up! including j1s!
oook. shant deny it evebodi is darn busy nowadays, esp e j2s la. wif all the s papers n studies n such. ya but dun forget this blog!!! sori ar liyu actually me oso v busy so ya tend to let things off my mind. cant believe half year b4 eveone is so enthu but now...err...
ok. xianyue isnt gona go on like this! not wif ani like real outings wif the juniors, or wif so boring a dazu as i haf witnessed today! wif the coming of the juniors....lets all put all the bad stuffs behind us in year 2005 n move on to 2006! (altho i myself oso noe tts hard). but we will all try la, wouldnt we?? hm. will haf a small pek tok wif the j1s this wednesday xiaozu, strictly for j1 xianyue onli. so ya will try to make evething transparent there for all to see us xianyue.
yea ever since ....lemme think. the minyi's stayover? THERE HAVE BEEN NO OUTINGS!! omg i think enqi n fel haven even come for ani outings yet!!! where have the spirit gone??? actually i oso ask myself la. but ...ya...evebodi too busy....
er. in reply to liyu's "how's evebodi's life now?" ques, ok i mus say i will damn bz tis 3 months cos of huang cheng! joined back doing cui chang work, haf to stay up quite late eveday. yupz, so tts the reason i haven been planning anithing for co YET...ya haf to go back to help cos huang cheng wil oways be part of me. niwae, i oso dun wana lose my other half which is CO, soooooo, trying to cope both CCAs now. u j1s out there, dun think can pon when im not around during xiaozu hor, i haf eyes evewhere hehe. niwae besides this two cca i haf the dreaded tons of studies n homework to do finish! n i think im worst out of all the xianyue j2 peeps la...cos i kind of slacked thruout j1. so ya. now ALL the teachers chasing aft me....damn. soooo, er, haf to admit quite stressed. AND besides these, haf to do some other stuff too. so...basically = NO TIME!!
of cos la. i put huang cheng n CO (xianyue first) at the top of prioritiees, so as i said, look forward for more outings or watsoever!!! Ning Fei haven die ok!
hope to c more entries coming up! including j1s!
Friday, January 20, 2006
How ComE No OnE BlOgs!
heya eveyone!liyu here. ive got one big burning question! How come no one blogs on xyz blog!?? its not like you all are out ta school or something=P i was super shocked to see the blog in such a -stagnant- mode...where are all my enthu jnrs eh?=P
alritey...shall just blog on wad ive been doing and hope some kind soul will update the blog on wads happening in hccoxyz/ hcco?=) wel, so far, ive been doing volunteer work with Youth Challenge. Its a non-governmental organisation, and we plan MANY activities for the elderly poor. So we get to call up the big companies and ask them for sponsorship and subsequently we get to organise tours and outings, distributions and activities for the elderly who really get thrilled when they can get out of their one-room accomodation and sometimes, just some people who will visit them.
Today, we brought 40 elderly to Mandai Orchid Farm and Bollywood Veggies. The orchid farm was REALLY beauutiful. Maving many different orchids all basking and blooming under the morning sun was such a sight. Unfortunately, the elderly got a bit tired of walking on the terraces to shang1 hua1. When we were close to leaving, each elderly happily received a beautiful bouquet of orchids sponsored by the farm. Its really damn nice~ The generosity of the farm's management really made our day=P Following that we had a tour at bollywood veggies, a veggie farm. Firstly we had this really healthy Vegetarian lunch that they loved and subsequently, we toured the farm. Some of the elderly were so excited about seeing the plants/veggies that they used to grow in their attap homes and the leaves veggies that they used to feed the PIGS they reared. Some even shared stories of having to da2 shui3 from the wells and having to carry the water all the way up the hill=)Can you imagine it? Their average age is 80 and they had gone through so many different stages of singapore that we could have never imagined. I cant help thinking how could pampered teens like us can possibly survived under circumstances of their younger days.
Yeps so thats just one of the activity we have been doing so far. Theres one bigger event coming up, a steamboat dinner for 250 elderly next fri and im really looking forward to it!=)
so wads up with xyz?? somebody had better post updates on this blog or else i will totally ignore u all from now on.-growl-
'05 J2s: Hey!! please blog and update about yourself! looking forward to hearin from you all =))
alritey...shall just blog on wad ive been doing and hope some kind soul will update the blog on wads happening in hccoxyz/ hcco?=) wel, so far, ive been doing volunteer work with Youth Challenge. Its a non-governmental organisation, and we plan MANY activities for the elderly poor. So we get to call up the big companies and ask them for sponsorship and subsequently we get to organise tours and outings, distributions and activities for the elderly who really get thrilled when they can get out of their one-room accomodation and sometimes, just some people who will visit them.
Today, we brought 40 elderly to Mandai Orchid Farm and Bollywood Veggies. The orchid farm was REALLY beauutiful. Maving many different orchids all basking and blooming under the morning sun was such a sight. Unfortunately, the elderly got a bit tired of walking on the terraces to shang1 hua1. When we were close to leaving, each elderly happily received a beautiful bouquet of orchids sponsored by the farm. Its really damn nice~ The generosity of the farm's management really made our day=P Following that we had a tour at bollywood veggies, a veggie farm. Firstly we had this really healthy Vegetarian lunch that they loved and subsequently, we toured the farm. Some of the elderly were so excited about seeing the plants/veggies that they used to grow in their attap homes and the leaves veggies that they used to feed the PIGS they reared. Some even shared stories of having to da2 shui3 from the wells and having to carry the water all the way up the hill=)Can you imagine it? Their average age is 80 and they had gone through so many different stages of singapore that we could have never imagined. I cant help thinking how could pampered teens like us can possibly survived under circumstances of their younger days.
Yeps so thats just one of the activity we have been doing so far. Theres one bigger event coming up, a steamboat dinner for 250 elderly next fri and im really looking forward to it!=)
so wads up with xyz?? somebody had better post updates on this blog or else i will totally ignore u all from now on.-growl-
'05 J2s: Hey!! please blog and update about yourself! looking forward to hearin from you all =))
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Xianyue Camp
i guess no one wants to blog cos there's nothing for them to blog. n why nothing for them to blog? cos either they are out of xianyue, or they are in but not doing anything in xianyue.
i shall be blunt and straightforward in this post.
i mus first apologise for using this blog as a place where i can shout out loud, but wat im gonna shout is of concern to xianyue, hence i c some bits of relevance for this post to be here.
as wat jiankai said, my flame has gone down, and the burning passion is quickly dissolving. as wat i said, im tired.
its been a long road since the day i joined this co. n im tired, bcos its tiring for someone to continue shouting when nobody hears.
i guess tis post will seem v irrelevant to anione looking at it rite now, cos the meaning behind this is not in the words, but between the lines.
i haf come to blog about the Xianyue Camp 2005.
it was the greatest challenge in my seventeen years of life. it showed alot to me, n i learnt alot, as i haf mentioned before. the amount of emotional and spiritual struggle within oneself, the amount of thickness the layers of ur face can make up of, the amount of happiness,sadness,disappointment,aghast,frustration,endurance,relief one can ever feel mixed up tgther, the camp haf provided me the excellent chance. n more i fear. for i noe that thru this camp, some part of me haf disappeared. i noe that this camp haf made me tired. i noe that this camp, altho it might not change anyone else, haf certainly changed me alot.
my tots n views on the camp goes along wif that for the current hcco and mayb even some of the old tchsco that i was in. for me, the hols haf been a "co" hols, thanks to the Xianyue Camp, budden, since i learnt so much, i din regret spending my time.
i wont say im not disappointed,angry with anyone. cos thats not the truth. i considered typing every bloody name on this site, but, life haf to go on. let not the names be eternally screened, so that i may forget what hatred n anguish i haf bore during the preparation for the camp. hope that pple will change, n life will seem happier, altho hidden underneath every smiling faces, there's alys so many that hides the sword in their heart.
i jus read zhengyou's blog. din noe wat the paricipants think about the camp, but now i do. the words that he used were heart-breaking, but the truth is said.im only sorry for the 15 odd pple that turned up, for the lousy organising, lousy planning, lousy schedule, lousy decisions, lousy.....its an irony. n to think that i imagined a camp so different as that of the Xianyue Camp 2005. the atmosphere. the people. the attitude. the activities. the team of organisers. me. different....out of the world. completely..unexpected?....im flipping thru my small little notebook....n realli. its terrifying. how so much haf not been done. how so mani haf not yet been said. how so .much.
i see it!!! i see it!! so many! give me! give me a team, give me a camp....i will do it. i am very sure i will do it. i can do it. i haf the ability...n now i noe y i cried on that day.
becos it failed.
simple but hard truth. im proud to c myself able to admit it. for it may look v easy for anione of u out there reading this blog, but no, its not for me. esp when u haf no one to look for. esp when all directions u face onli blank, expressionless faces look back at u. esp when ur frens wan to help but duno how to bcos they haf nv experienced this before. i nv blame them.
its a torture. if i haf been anione of my unenthu hcco-mates organising, i will haf died. realli. at least go crazy.
my parents tot i was crazy......
can u believe it, when u haf to resort to discussing the camp wif ur family? do u noe how many times i yelled at my family mems, zhengyou? when i haf no one to yell at too. u noe how it feels, dun u? u noe how it feels rite? but at least u haf bong rite?...n do u noe how bad it was when i regain my conscious aft yelling?when u realise tt u jus did sth to someone that is NOT responsible for ani of the shit that u r doing? that is totally out of their business. n its ur family. try it. it hurts.
i was stressed. right since duno when, before promos.i din realise it, until one day when i asked my bro for help, n he gave me a blunt ans without thinking cos he was busy. he haf a life. i was anguished, angry. i tot he jus din care. n i shouted...n den he asked me one ques calmly "are u stressed?" n i said, "yes". that was the time when i realise the camp was taking up my life. i was blind..
u c, nobody can realli understand wat the small frog in the well is saying, bcos everybodi is up there looking down at it. even if he/she listens to wat the frog croak, the onli thing he/she can feel is the frog's tone. not the frog's heart. it doesnt hurt when u noe pple dun understand. it hurts when u noe pple think they noe they understand. when actually wat they understand is bullshit. atleast some of them.
the notebook is cool.i din noe i had so mani plans for the camp.now i can safely say that the participants of xianyue camp 2005 haf onli gone thru 5% of the dreamed xianyue camp 2005. at first i tot it was 10%. but i was wrong....pple who flipped thru the notebook, often read the diary part. they missed the big part..the planning one. bcos they think these parts are not important. bcos its all over the place. but ironically, the important parts are all around.
i guess in the end, it was realli "eventless", huh?
it is my fault.i started the camp, i destroyed it wif my bare hands. as wat i haf told zhengyou and dayang during the stayover, "this camp is an extra. it is an out-of-the-world,it is out of the cycle. bcos in the co world, in the jc life, nobodi haf ever heard of the 'Xianyue Camp' before. therefore its feared. pple fear the unknown. pple shun away. therefore its destined to be cancelled." in the end, it was not. but sadly to say, it has transformed into sth that i haf nv fathom before. it was not even a camp.
im not gg to bitch about the sls, those team of organisers that said they wanted to organise tis camp. i haf no one to bitch about. they haf their reasons in leaving, i haf my goal to reach. but i say that its my fault solely, for not making u all enthu about the camp, for not handling the planning, esp the venue and stuff, well. i haf tot thru it, n they leave bcos of me. or rather, my actions. hence i learnt this one impt lesson in the camp: nv blame others, blame urself first.i wont hide it, but y the camp turn out like this, 99% is bcos of a weak team of organisers.n i say this again, tat the fault lie solely on me.
i was too ignorant.
i din wan to go into this. in the past i used to think if u r strong enuff, nothing can stop u. i realise until now that, as i haf so painfully said in the camp, that u alys need help. whether issit physically, or emotionally. u need pple around u. to help. simply....to be around.
sometimes during the course of the camp, i will think that this is not "xianyue camp" but "ningfei's camp". i tot of that when i cancelled a meeting 2 am in the morn.n i felt cold inside out. cos tis was not wat i wanted it to be. altho many would haf believe so, IT IS NOT. n to hell to those who believe thus. bcos im not that kind of person. so dun use ur own kind of char to judge my char. i din want it to be lidat...n when i heard other sec sch pple saying "ur camp" "ningfei's poor thing camp" ...i duno wat to feel. its like pouring a truck of rubbish onto u. u all realli make me feel like im like an idiot....like i haf nothing beta to do. like im doing some spa service for u all...like im a servant. like im nothing. n a nothing is organsing sth,.....so who cares???? who cares to attend something so unimportant? i respect ur decision n choice in coming or not, but i despised ur attitude. u may go ahead n think that the camp is rubbish, i wont mind, but u haf no right to push evething to me when u duno the details. altho its my fault, u duno WHY its my fault.
n thus i start to hate these people.
but, it was a miracle for me not to rebut or retaliate. i learnt to keep low. n remember. rmb those faces, or names, or reps of schools, that haf in one way or another lost their basic form of human nature. n i will remember...unconsciously no doubt, but i will remember...
sadly, thats wat i told myself. to remember! dun forget those bastards! those evil-faced foul-tongued people! dun forget the cold-hearted world, the brain-washed ultra-conservative society, the stupid excuses that pple made up jus to avoid joining the camp! dun forget them!...but no. onli a child thinks that. life will go on...may this be the last time i tokked about them. bcos from now on they are strangers to me.
"even if there are 100 pple who haf shown evil, n 1 person who haf shown kindness in the process of preparing the camp,i will onli rmb the 1 person, bcos onli he/she is worth remembering."
i think i haf spoken enuff.i apologise for using this blog to shout.
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i jus took a break. to forget about the evil human nature that we all haf -- to hate. bcos im gonna thank pple now, n i dun wan to bear the "to hate" heart to thank pple.
ok. i shal start to thank:
the Singapore Soka Association. whom i owed so much so much for. haha u participants may not feel it, not even siu hon or weiyang, cos u all wasnt in contact with them at all before the camp..i did. n their politeness and kindness realli awed me. i mean, who would haf cared for a bunch of co guys gathering around and having a camp? which organisation will lend the place for us to use? n besides that, the sleeping bags, the laptop, the projector....the keyboard, the milo powders, the utensils....i realli duno how to thank them. at least for my whole life i wouldnt forget the SSA.even if u may not see this, miss wong n miss tan, but i sincerely thank you from the bottom of both the camp's heart and my heart.
i realise i owe alot of pple for this camp...
to the list of sectional leaders of different secondary schools and junior colleges, whom i haf troubled over the months or weeks in contacting their sections and informing them about the camp, my heartfelt thanks for ur time n effort
Vincent Cat High
Xin Hui SNGS
Yu Hao TCHS
Wenqi/Andrea/Hannah NYGH
Ming Quan RI
Sherry/Joyce RGS
Wei Jian Pasir Ris
Liza Nanhua
Ziwei RV
Rachel Zhonghua
n for those whom i din personally contact,
Dunman High CO SL
VSCO SL
Ngee Ann CO SL
CCHS (M) CO SL
CCHS (Y) CO SL
Coral Sec CO SL
n of cos, not forgetting the SLs of all JCs except SRJC(which dun haf a co), the group whom i haf started my idea out with originally:
to those whom did not join in the comm:
Chinyong VJ
Jiayi YJ
Linghui JJ (VP and not SL)
Yan Ping NJ
Kah Yee CJ (Pres and not SL)
Chuan Guan MJ
Bernice/Yifang IJ
yea mus apologise for taking up ur time n such. altho some of u alr knew that ur mems wont be interested, but i din giv up hope. yep thx at least for replying to my messages...
and, not forgetting my sls comm who had sludged thru the months listening to my phone calls, receiving my bad news via smses, n attending my boring mtgs(now that i think of it, it was realli sianzzz...):
wanyan PJ : thanks for doing the letter for the boss! haf to take off some of ur time to do the letter cos i was busy wif another thing. moreover u were the secretary! alrite n thx for listening to all those phone calls about updates on the camp. hur i think i shld thank all the sls for that.n yupz thx for asking ur jc mems too!
linglong ACJC: thanks for accompanying me to tour the soka place and the Kent Ridge Park!well cant say u benefited from it since in the end u din come, budden jus thx for the company.and oso to attend the meeting at hwachong.
pei han ACJC: thanks for spending ur time off in the first place to contact ur fellow section mates! even when u were about to leave, u stil did sth out of ur job. so thx!
weiling AJC: mus thank u for doing the score....hope u will send it to me next year! n for ur enthuness in the veri first place...yea stil rmb u said u were looking forward to meet the fellow SLs even before the first meeting. i mus say sorry for making the mtgs n such a failure....i wasnt even able to do a contact list for us..yea so sorry for the disappointment caused. n thx for informing ur section mates...din blame u for them not coming over...
cheryl SAJC: u i haf realli to say sorry cos in the first place i din noe the response from ur sch was tt bad...den i keep calling u up to "update" u ...yea. i was thinking u sure would be in the comm....yep so sorry for ur time wasted. but thank you for informing ur section mates esp, cos u were the first to reply n confirm about the situation at ur school....right at the very first time in july. i jus wasnt able to confirm alot of things right until november....so ur departure from the comm n the camp i understand. yep n thx for the time used to discuss how to make ur frens go....
yuanting TJC: thanks for the support! one of those few that i can tokked to actually. thx for informing ur section mates, n dunman high! not forgetting finding a replacement for u since u haf work to do. n thx for jus sludging through and tokking crap!
huiling RJC: alrite u were the one skeptical one about the camp. haha wif alot of questions directing towards me and demanding if the camp is gg to work out...yea but thx for jus discussing the camp wif me during geco pracs n such! n for the multiple advices issued....n for the games tot? n for the two places that u found on the web....yea appreciate the help u lent.quite sad that u werent able to make it for the camp in the end...budden, next time?? haha. n u r realli a music freak..
weiliang TpJC: yo dude! honestly was saddened by the fact that u cant come for the camp in the end....jus a few days b4 the camp.jus wana say that u haf done alot alot alr! so thx! for the consent forms, for the garnering pple, ur side sec schs n such, for the numerous constructive advices about the camp t-shirt, the camp banner, the poster, the flyers(which all din turn up in the camp.....haiz)the late online chats. the stuff that i nid someone to do n u do it. n yep a great moral support for someone organising this camp....for pulling thru the 3 mtgs...despite sick n not free n such. haha even went pooling n such rite...yep many thanks! stay in touch!
siu hon NyJC: See below!
to all the comm SLs:
jus wana say sorry for letting all of u wait for me during meetings....i was late 30 mins for the first mtg, 1 hour for the 2nd, 40 mins for the third. so sorry! *slap slap*
n as i said, i dun blame ani of u for not attending the camp in the end :)
to my section mates:
yea Xianyue Camp 2005 haf shown alot. jus wana thank minyi for coming on the first day (altho i stil duno why u changed ur mind) n jin guan for the moral support, altho i noe u hate camps ...haha.xianyue camp helped me realise that things are jus liddat in xianyue now....no matter how hard i try, i stil nid a response from u all. yups. but i think i will jus keep trying? altho im tired la...hccoxyz rox!!
to jiankai and weiquan, my two best frens in class: thanks for the support!! u guys rox all the way! hell u two were even more concerned about the camp den some of the pple involved in it. hahaha...thx! realli is huan nan jian zhen qing....
to the hcco peeps who were coming to watch the concert: geraldine,chee gake,jian kai,zhixuan,royston,shou hao: thx for the support! u duno how much u gave to this poor soul!
to none other than the participants of Xianyue Camp 2005, of whom the camp would not haf even been held:
hongfei
junzhi
ruihong
chenyang
gim thia
my dear juniors who came to support....appreciate that u all came n lasted all 3 days! n not complaining too....hope u all learn sth? n pardon me if i was rude cos i was stressed...realli. esp u, chenyang...yea.n thx u all for adding to the sounds and noises of xianyue camp! hehe.
minyi
amelia
rachel
hahhaa.the sole 3 gals on the first day. minyi i dunnid say u shld noe how i feel. the other two....appreciate alot that u all came! esp esp when its a camp full of boys....(chi high boys)....n rachel ! haha. u realli got the guts man. n u got the enthuness...ha so dun be afraid to be enthu! n jus thx for putting in effort to ask pple to come....mm.
hong guan
heh hope the camp will make u more close to tchs boys. but jus wana say thx for coming!
n not forgetting those who came in on the second day:
the 3 RGS gals: sherry, joyce, serene
the 2 st. nicks gals: jiawei, sutyee
the 1 nyjc guy: minghao
yea thx for jus showing face....n hafing fun wif us! realli hope u all had a great time, altho wif the lagged schedule n such i doubt so :( ......thx for helping to inform pple! minghao thx for lugging those pails of water bombs all the way to KRP n having to sit down n listen to me about the games while bitten by mosquitoes....sherry thx for the msg! quite a morale-booster....
the 1 nyjc guy who came for the briefing/meeting but din come for the camp....: julian
yep thx for coming....appreciate ur presence!
the 6 seniors:
junkai,andrew,timothy,zhiyong,lixiang,boon shan
boon shan having to wake up so early to come onli to find that all participants are still sleeping :X....n thx for offering to help too!
junkai for coming aft (soooooo) many times i called n persuaded u to come....yup but hope u haf the time to prac ur erhu there :)
lixiang for coming over aft ur work n showing support all the way>>>>
zhiyong for agreeing to come right in the first place....(u were the first hehe)
timo for coming over on the first night, den go home, den come on second day again....(normally when pple come and see the state of the camp they will siam the second day....)
andrew for helping to carry all the shit for the station games !!! (which in the end half of it we din use...) n realli sorry! for dumping u at the crossroad and shouting at u over the phone ...was damn bloody hell stressed at KRP tt day.thx!!!
n thx oso for making the balloons with the words "Thank You SSA".....
*pant* see so many to thank for the camp....
i sincerely thank the two seniors who came:
melvin: altho u r J8 (or J9???), n not in xianyue, u still showed support for the camp, including the scores for anjing, n coming for the first day, playing the icebreakers, practising wif us. i cant put the thanks in words...u are a great senior! do come back often n join in the activities!!! no matter wat, u r still part of HCCO, cos u haven forget that u are part of it....AND, i still owe u $7!! (i think)
liangsheng: ok mus say sorry first, (sori!), for screaming at u unreasonably jus few days before the camp (which was my ultra-high-stressed period). please understand...but realli thx for coming back n helping out....n asking about the camp every now and den. now tt i organise this camp, i feel wat u haf gone thru when u organised the alumni co...or at least part of it. mayb urs is a subset cos urs onli nid to contact hwachong pple....but mine haf to contact pple from other schools that i dun even noe....but in any case, thx for creating fun and laughter in the camp! (altho not ur type of fun n laughter! :) )
whoaa.....finally. to some of the pple that i appreciated alot for their help...
lan lao shi! aka mr lam. whom without which the Xianyue Camp 2005 would nv haf occurred!..haha shant say why here. cos he wouldnt be looking at this. but i stil rmb tt time nearing midnite, i called u while i was out on NEL...den when u suggested that place...suddenly my phone bat went flat! i was so panicky den....haf to wait until i rush home from mrt....den call u immediately once i stepped inside. den it was u who took quite some time to help me....yuppppz. it was sth to be remembered...
miss tan! as in, the teacher incharge for HCCO...yup i noe i bugged u ALOT for this xianyue camp...n ya i was asking too much i admit. both for the venue and for the overnight thing. realli soooori for the trouble i caused wif Mrs Chin n for taking up ur lessons time. thx for ur effort in making everything smooth for the camp....n for the advise n help that u gave. okok, wont bugged u again for no reason la! my chem teacher next year leh....
to the two who were two pillars of moral support for me during the organising of the camp:
vera (TJC): yup altho u were a substitute for the comm mems u proved more than that! appreciate the times when u called to discuss the camp ...n for finding the sponsors n writing to the organisations, introducing to them about our camp....n of informing 3 sec schools n ur own tjc school, n of publicising the camp until like to other schools that i dun even noe got co....den to ur frens too (yea u got realli alot of co contacts)...n thx esp for urging ur tj section mates to go!!! heard from weiyang wat u did la....i often wonder how one tt is not attending the camp n not previously involved in the camp can be so enthu n persistent in asking pple to come.....oh well. u r one exception.aniwae mus mus mus thank you for the moral support...err ya cos u somehow replace the SLs that were leaving one by one....n sori haf to trouble u wif the camp stuffs....arr. duno wat to say. jus thx!
dayang (my hcco senior!) hahahha. u were prob the first one whom i bitched about the Xianyue Camp. i rmb it was at beauty world? the Macs there. yups.yay thx for listening to me den! we tokked late into the night aft that pooling session rmb? (that time i thrash u ...) yea tt was the first ever i tokked about the xianyue camp in detail other than my family.hehe.thx for the listening ear! n of cos...thx for the utmost support all the way for the camp!!!!noe u were quite sad that bcos of army cant go for the camp...u noe when i was at my lowest, at the start of dec, when i was about to cancel the camp, i tot tt "nvm la, still got dayang will surely go one." haha. u were a buddha den lo.thx for encouraging me to go on at my hardest time....a v good companion!
n lastly, but mostly, to the four of u,whom without which the Xianyue Camp 2005 wouldnt haf been possible, literally:
my two frens cum helper cum camp-mates:
siu hon (nyjc): dude! alys so dudedy....yup u were the onli one left out of all the original 9 organisers, n i thank u for staying n helping out. more importantly, for being "alone" in the camp, for most of the participants are either from the same outside orch or same school or jc. u are realli the most out...dun mind me say. but haha u stayed on thru-out the 3 days, i duno how n why, but jus thx for transporting all the food, for lending ur gaohu (dragon head) n erhus, for copying fenpus, for tokking cok to me n weiyang, for insisting on helping out instead of having fun in the camp with the participants, for trying to cheer the whole mood up, the whole atmosphere up, for bon-ning me...for having fun with us, a bunch of strangers! esp for helping out in the station games....u noe...the hard work n such. for listening to wat i asked u to do during the camp, altho u haf no obligation to do so. alot bah...for informing too ur 4 section mates, for pulling in pple to come n help...mus say sori for ani mood swings that i had during the camp,n for ani rude things i said. cos again: i was stressed.haha.yup if got another time,dun mind being helpers with u again! n keep that xianyue spirit up for as long as u can!
weiyang(tjc): haha. i DIN expect u will help THAT much.haha. u din seemed that keen to help in the first place. but i was glad that u helped out. yea u were the excellent kitchen boy....all washing/making of bread/preparing of stuffs/ haha u auto will go do one.den got anithing will ask me if nid to do....woa realli thx alot for helping out! altho in the first place u werent even supposed to do anithing at all!....like i jus asked u whether u can helped out onli days before??? n haha thx for everything i haf said up there, plus esp the tokking cok sessions....n ya u are a bloody direct person cannot tahan hahaha.alrite n thx for urging me along during the camp to keep on to schedule when i was losing faith in everything...i guess everyone can see i was huh. but u keep asking me to go on to the next activities...haha my indecisiveness realli v bad ....okok. yup jus thx for being one of the lonely 3 pple doing all the hard work behind the camp!!!
yep hope all 3 of us can team up tgther again, this time to organise a v successful camp!
im gg to die....blardy tired!!....budden. on to the last two whom im eternally grateful for:
zhenming (our dear chairman of HCCO!): THX! i knew u were bloody tired, both physically and mentally. u were v stressed too. even during the camp, calls for appeals n such...u were v busy, yet u gave ur best for the camp! n i noe being a group leader is v hard,im jus grateful that u n zy can so successfully bring up the mood on the first day! not onli for this, but for the silent support that u gave me for the camp, both as a fren and as a section-mate, im sori that i cant discuss the details of the camp to u, partly bcos i din wan to trouble u, partly bcos there jus was too much to say!!n yea, ur support meant alot, n esp thx for understanding how i felt when nobody wana come for the camp, n nobody wana come for the concert. tis kind of thing, is not use mouth say say onli....can feel one.n u realli helped out bcos of ren qing....so...yup i owe u a big one.ur trouble wif current HCCO, got anithing tel me! i wil do the utmost i can....
zhengyou (my junior cum decessor):heheh.its realli an irony...that time when i was about to cancel the camp? the day b4 i wanted to call soka n cancel the venue...budden there was the stayover. n i tot, mayb somebody will change my mind? cos i wasnt 100% confirm tt i will cancel it, i was 95%. n the onli person that i tot of that could change my mind was u. n haha, u succeeded and the camp went on! altho it wasnt as wat i had expected, but thx so much for saving the camp! n of cos, not to mention the numerous night talks that we had, which would relate to the xianyue camp no matter wat (the clarke quay, the chinatown) yupsss. u were both a physical n moral support, for u helped in contacting pple (helped alot!) n ya dun think i dun appreciate it but jus that....haiz.guys are liddat.n i realise that, the lu zhengyou of sec 2 - 3 is quite diff from that of sec 4! haha.improvement indeed. both the mind n heart.u should noe wat i mean. ok mus say sorry here for yelling at u twice, once over the phone, the other on the 2nd day. both were stressed, sure u understand. but i jus dun wan u to haf an impression of me yelling jus bcos im stressed, i dun yell whenever im stressed. i yelled at u cos i needed somebody to hear me. budden. ya i guess its my fault that everything happened. felt quite bad aft i yelled on the 2nd day, cos u realli haf no responsibility watsoever in the camp, hell i onli asked u weeks before? or days. n ur group leader post is hard i noe, esp with so litt pple, n with the weak activities n planning from us organisers. u try to understand wat im gg thru, but hell, nobody can, so jus wana say thx for jus trying to understand...mayb when u haf gone thru all this, den u will noe? budden, u wouldn't haf to go thru all this, cos Xianyue Camp 2005 haf alr been organised and carried out.....thx for everything. from spending time to contact, to understand, to being a group leader, a fren, n a support. without u the flame of xianyue camp would haf been blown out a long time ago, but u reminded me of my past years in chsco....that youth who had guts. well. dare to think of the impossible, as i haf repeated so mani times.u asked me to storm out everything the night before the camp, to shout everytthing out...so that the next day during the camp, i would be the happy me, cos u dun wan to c a depressed or pissed me organising a camp rite? but in the end, i still did mood swings rite? i still wasnt able to compose myself enuff....n still stone around, still pull a sad face. well for all that u n zhenming haf been trying so hard to make pple laugh, here i am to make pple sad wif my pissed look. i dun blame u for blaming me. i blamed myself too.budden. yup.i haf learnt thru tis ...
i am tired. its 6.10am. i started typing at ....2am??? 4 hours!!! the longest post i ever write before!!!
the no. of "thx" and "!" in this post is far more than all those i haf used in my previous posts...
i haf given hell lot for this camp. thanks to those who took it.this will be the last time i give to Xianyue Camp 2005.from now on life will return back to normal for me, no pursuing of venues, no running to principal's office,no having to do proposals late at night alys at the back of my mind, no running to com lab to do proposals during lunch breaks, no walking aimlessly around home thinking of games to play, no staring into space and visualing how the camp will take place, no taking out of my small little black notebook to jot down ani ideas that came into my mind, no contacting of pple that i duno, no asking SLs when are they free for meetings, no perfecting my english in the parental consent forms, no having to stand up for all the camp costs, no breaking down bcos of the stress...
no Xianyue Camp. the out-of-the-place camp that no one noes.
or issit???....
Xianyue Camp 2006......anyone?
i shall be blunt and straightforward in this post.
i mus first apologise for using this blog as a place where i can shout out loud, but wat im gonna shout is of concern to xianyue, hence i c some bits of relevance for this post to be here.
as wat jiankai said, my flame has gone down, and the burning passion is quickly dissolving. as wat i said, im tired.
its been a long road since the day i joined this co. n im tired, bcos its tiring for someone to continue shouting when nobody hears.
i guess tis post will seem v irrelevant to anione looking at it rite now, cos the meaning behind this is not in the words, but between the lines.
i haf come to blog about the Xianyue Camp 2005.
it was the greatest challenge in my seventeen years of life. it showed alot to me, n i learnt alot, as i haf mentioned before. the amount of emotional and spiritual struggle within oneself, the amount of thickness the layers of ur face can make up of, the amount of happiness,sadness,disappointment,aghast,frustration,endurance,relief one can ever feel mixed up tgther, the camp haf provided me the excellent chance. n more i fear. for i noe that thru this camp, some part of me haf disappeared. i noe that this camp haf made me tired. i noe that this camp, altho it might not change anyone else, haf certainly changed me alot.
my tots n views on the camp goes along wif that for the current hcco and mayb even some of the old tchsco that i was in. for me, the hols haf been a "co" hols, thanks to the Xianyue Camp, budden, since i learnt so much, i din regret spending my time.
i wont say im not disappointed,angry with anyone. cos thats not the truth. i considered typing every bloody name on this site, but, life haf to go on. let not the names be eternally screened, so that i may forget what hatred n anguish i haf bore during the preparation for the camp. hope that pple will change, n life will seem happier, altho hidden underneath every smiling faces, there's alys so many that hides the sword in their heart.
i jus read zhengyou's blog. din noe wat the paricipants think about the camp, but now i do. the words that he used were heart-breaking, but the truth is said.im only sorry for the 15 odd pple that turned up, for the lousy organising, lousy planning, lousy schedule, lousy decisions, lousy.....its an irony. n to think that i imagined a camp so different as that of the Xianyue Camp 2005. the atmosphere. the people. the attitude. the activities. the team of organisers. me. different....out of the world. completely..unexpected?....im flipping thru my small little notebook....n realli. its terrifying. how so much haf not been done. how so mani haf not yet been said. how so .much.
i see it!!! i see it!! so many! give me! give me a team, give me a camp....i will do it. i am very sure i will do it. i can do it. i haf the ability...n now i noe y i cried on that day.
becos it failed.
simple but hard truth. im proud to c myself able to admit it. for it may look v easy for anione of u out there reading this blog, but no, its not for me. esp when u haf no one to look for. esp when all directions u face onli blank, expressionless faces look back at u. esp when ur frens wan to help but duno how to bcos they haf nv experienced this before. i nv blame them.
its a torture. if i haf been anione of my unenthu hcco-mates organising, i will haf died. realli. at least go crazy.
my parents tot i was crazy......
can u believe it, when u haf to resort to discussing the camp wif ur family? do u noe how many times i yelled at my family mems, zhengyou? when i haf no one to yell at too. u noe how it feels, dun u? u noe how it feels rite? but at least u haf bong rite?...n do u noe how bad it was when i regain my conscious aft yelling?when u realise tt u jus did sth to someone that is NOT responsible for ani of the shit that u r doing? that is totally out of their business. n its ur family. try it. it hurts.
i was stressed. right since duno when, before promos.i din realise it, until one day when i asked my bro for help, n he gave me a blunt ans without thinking cos he was busy. he haf a life. i was anguished, angry. i tot he jus din care. n i shouted...n den he asked me one ques calmly "are u stressed?" n i said, "yes". that was the time when i realise the camp was taking up my life. i was blind..
u c, nobody can realli understand wat the small frog in the well is saying, bcos everybodi is up there looking down at it. even if he/she listens to wat the frog croak, the onli thing he/she can feel is the frog's tone. not the frog's heart. it doesnt hurt when u noe pple dun understand. it hurts when u noe pple think they noe they understand. when actually wat they understand is bullshit. atleast some of them.
the notebook is cool.i din noe i had so mani plans for the camp.now i can safely say that the participants of xianyue camp 2005 haf onli gone thru 5% of the dreamed xianyue camp 2005. at first i tot it was 10%. but i was wrong....pple who flipped thru the notebook, often read the diary part. they missed the big part..the planning one. bcos they think these parts are not important. bcos its all over the place. but ironically, the important parts are all around.
i guess in the end, it was realli "eventless", huh?
it is my fault.i started the camp, i destroyed it wif my bare hands. as wat i haf told zhengyou and dayang during the stayover, "this camp is an extra. it is an out-of-the-world,it is out of the cycle. bcos in the co world, in the jc life, nobodi haf ever heard of the 'Xianyue Camp' before. therefore its feared. pple fear the unknown. pple shun away. therefore its destined to be cancelled." in the end, it was not. but sadly to say, it has transformed into sth that i haf nv fathom before. it was not even a camp.
im not gg to bitch about the sls, those team of organisers that said they wanted to organise tis camp. i haf no one to bitch about. they haf their reasons in leaving, i haf my goal to reach. but i say that its my fault solely, for not making u all enthu about the camp, for not handling the planning, esp the venue and stuff, well. i haf tot thru it, n they leave bcos of me. or rather, my actions. hence i learnt this one impt lesson in the camp: nv blame others, blame urself first.i wont hide it, but y the camp turn out like this, 99% is bcos of a weak team of organisers.n i say this again, tat the fault lie solely on me.
i was too ignorant.
i din wan to go into this. in the past i used to think if u r strong enuff, nothing can stop u. i realise until now that, as i haf so painfully said in the camp, that u alys need help. whether issit physically, or emotionally. u need pple around u. to help. simply....to be around.
sometimes during the course of the camp, i will think that this is not "xianyue camp" but "ningfei's camp". i tot of that when i cancelled a meeting 2 am in the morn.n i felt cold inside out. cos tis was not wat i wanted it to be. altho many would haf believe so, IT IS NOT. n to hell to those who believe thus. bcos im not that kind of person. so dun use ur own kind of char to judge my char. i din want it to be lidat...n when i heard other sec sch pple saying "ur camp" "ningfei's poor thing camp" ...i duno wat to feel. its like pouring a truck of rubbish onto u. u all realli make me feel like im like an idiot....like i haf nothing beta to do. like im doing some spa service for u all...like im a servant. like im nothing. n a nothing is organsing sth,.....so who cares???? who cares to attend something so unimportant? i respect ur decision n choice in coming or not, but i despised ur attitude. u may go ahead n think that the camp is rubbish, i wont mind, but u haf no right to push evething to me when u duno the details. altho its my fault, u duno WHY its my fault.
n thus i start to hate these people.
but, it was a miracle for me not to rebut or retaliate. i learnt to keep low. n remember. rmb those faces, or names, or reps of schools, that haf in one way or another lost their basic form of human nature. n i will remember...unconsciously no doubt, but i will remember...
sadly, thats wat i told myself. to remember! dun forget those bastards! those evil-faced foul-tongued people! dun forget the cold-hearted world, the brain-washed ultra-conservative society, the stupid excuses that pple made up jus to avoid joining the camp! dun forget them!...but no. onli a child thinks that. life will go on...may this be the last time i tokked about them. bcos from now on they are strangers to me.
"even if there are 100 pple who haf shown evil, n 1 person who haf shown kindness in the process of preparing the camp,i will onli rmb the 1 person, bcos onli he/she is worth remembering."
i think i haf spoken enuff.i apologise for using this blog to shout.
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i jus took a break. to forget about the evil human nature that we all haf -- to hate. bcos im gonna thank pple now, n i dun wan to bear the "to hate" heart to thank pple.
ok. i shal start to thank:
the Singapore Soka Association. whom i owed so much so much for. haha u participants may not feel it, not even siu hon or weiyang, cos u all wasnt in contact with them at all before the camp..i did. n their politeness and kindness realli awed me. i mean, who would haf cared for a bunch of co guys gathering around and having a camp? which organisation will lend the place for us to use? n besides that, the sleeping bags, the laptop, the projector....the keyboard, the milo powders, the utensils....i realli duno how to thank them. at least for my whole life i wouldnt forget the SSA.even if u may not see this, miss wong n miss tan, but i sincerely thank you from the bottom of both the camp's heart and my heart.
i realise i owe alot of pple for this camp...
to the list of sectional leaders of different secondary schools and junior colleges, whom i haf troubled over the months or weeks in contacting their sections and informing them about the camp, my heartfelt thanks for ur time n effort
Vincent Cat High
Xin Hui SNGS
Yu Hao TCHS
Wenqi/Andrea/Hannah NYGH
Ming Quan RI
Sherry/Joyce RGS
Wei Jian Pasir Ris
Liza Nanhua
Ziwei RV
Rachel Zhonghua
n for those whom i din personally contact,
Dunman High CO SL
VSCO SL
Ngee Ann CO SL
CCHS (M) CO SL
CCHS (Y) CO SL
Coral Sec CO SL
n of cos, not forgetting the SLs of all JCs except SRJC(which dun haf a co), the group whom i haf started my idea out with originally:
to those whom did not join in the comm:
Chinyong VJ
Jiayi YJ
Linghui JJ (VP and not SL)
Yan Ping NJ
Kah Yee CJ (Pres and not SL)
Chuan Guan MJ
Bernice/Yifang IJ
yea mus apologise for taking up ur time n such. altho some of u alr knew that ur mems wont be interested, but i din giv up hope. yep thx at least for replying to my messages...
and, not forgetting my sls comm who had sludged thru the months listening to my phone calls, receiving my bad news via smses, n attending my boring mtgs(now that i think of it, it was realli sianzzz...):
wanyan PJ : thanks for doing the letter for the boss! haf to take off some of ur time to do the letter cos i was busy wif another thing. moreover u were the secretary! alrite n thx for listening to all those phone calls about updates on the camp. hur i think i shld thank all the sls for that.n yupz thx for asking ur jc mems too!
linglong ACJC: thanks for accompanying me to tour the soka place and the Kent Ridge Park!well cant say u benefited from it since in the end u din come, budden jus thx for the company.and oso to attend the meeting at hwachong.
pei han ACJC: thanks for spending ur time off in the first place to contact ur fellow section mates! even when u were about to leave, u stil did sth out of ur job. so thx!
weiling AJC: mus thank u for doing the score....hope u will send it to me next year! n for ur enthuness in the veri first place...yea stil rmb u said u were looking forward to meet the fellow SLs even before the first meeting. i mus say sorry for making the mtgs n such a failure....i wasnt even able to do a contact list for us..yea so sorry for the disappointment caused. n thx for informing ur section mates...din blame u for them not coming over...
cheryl SAJC: u i haf realli to say sorry cos in the first place i din noe the response from ur sch was tt bad...den i keep calling u up to "update" u ...yea. i was thinking u sure would be in the comm....yep so sorry for ur time wasted. but thank you for informing ur section mates esp, cos u were the first to reply n confirm about the situation at ur school....right at the very first time in july. i jus wasnt able to confirm alot of things right until november....so ur departure from the comm n the camp i understand. yep n thx for the time used to discuss how to make ur frens go....
yuanting TJC: thanks for the support! one of those few that i can tokked to actually. thx for informing ur section mates, n dunman high! not forgetting finding a replacement for u since u haf work to do. n thx for jus sludging through and tokking crap!
huiling RJC: alrite u were the one skeptical one about the camp. haha wif alot of questions directing towards me and demanding if the camp is gg to work out...yea but thx for jus discussing the camp wif me during geco pracs n such! n for the multiple advices issued....n for the games tot? n for the two places that u found on the web....yea appreciate the help u lent.quite sad that u werent able to make it for the camp in the end...budden, next time?? haha. n u r realli a music freak..
weiliang TpJC: yo dude! honestly was saddened by the fact that u cant come for the camp in the end....jus a few days b4 the camp.jus wana say that u haf done alot alot alr! so thx! for the consent forms, for the garnering pple, ur side sec schs n such, for the numerous constructive advices about the camp t-shirt, the camp banner, the poster, the flyers(which all din turn up in the camp.....haiz)the late online chats. the stuff that i nid someone to do n u do it. n yep a great moral support for someone organising this camp....for pulling thru the 3 mtgs...despite sick n not free n such. haha even went pooling n such rite...yep many thanks! stay in touch!
siu hon NyJC: See below!
to all the comm SLs:
jus wana say sorry for letting all of u wait for me during meetings....i was late 30 mins for the first mtg, 1 hour for the 2nd, 40 mins for the third. so sorry! *slap slap*
n as i said, i dun blame ani of u for not attending the camp in the end :)
to my section mates:
yea Xianyue Camp 2005 haf shown alot. jus wana thank minyi for coming on the first day (altho i stil duno why u changed ur mind) n jin guan for the moral support, altho i noe u hate camps ...haha.xianyue camp helped me realise that things are jus liddat in xianyue now....no matter how hard i try, i stil nid a response from u all. yups. but i think i will jus keep trying? altho im tired la...hccoxyz rox!!
to jiankai and weiquan, my two best frens in class: thanks for the support!! u guys rox all the way! hell u two were even more concerned about the camp den some of the pple involved in it. hahaha...thx! realli is huan nan jian zhen qing....
to the hcco peeps who were coming to watch the concert: geraldine,chee gake,jian kai,zhixuan,royston,shou hao: thx for the support! u duno how much u gave to this poor soul!
to none other than the participants of Xianyue Camp 2005, of whom the camp would not haf even been held:
hongfei
junzhi
ruihong
chenyang
gim thia
my dear juniors who came to support....appreciate that u all came n lasted all 3 days! n not complaining too....hope u all learn sth? n pardon me if i was rude cos i was stressed...realli. esp u, chenyang...yea.n thx u all for adding to the sounds and noises of xianyue camp! hehe.
minyi
amelia
rachel
hahhaa.the sole 3 gals on the first day. minyi i dunnid say u shld noe how i feel. the other two....appreciate alot that u all came! esp esp when its a camp full of boys....(chi high boys)....n rachel ! haha. u realli got the guts man. n u got the enthuness...ha so dun be afraid to be enthu! n jus thx for putting in effort to ask pple to come....mm.
hong guan
heh hope the camp will make u more close to tchs boys. but jus wana say thx for coming!
n not forgetting those who came in on the second day:
the 3 RGS gals: sherry, joyce, serene
the 2 st. nicks gals: jiawei, sutyee
the 1 nyjc guy: minghao
yea thx for jus showing face....n hafing fun wif us! realli hope u all had a great time, altho wif the lagged schedule n such i doubt so :( ......thx for helping to inform pple! minghao thx for lugging those pails of water bombs all the way to KRP n having to sit down n listen to me about the games while bitten by mosquitoes....sherry thx for the msg! quite a morale-booster....
the 1 nyjc guy who came for the briefing/meeting but din come for the camp....: julian
yep thx for coming....appreciate ur presence!
the 6 seniors:
junkai,andrew,timothy,zhiyong,lixiang,boon shan
boon shan having to wake up so early to come onli to find that all participants are still sleeping :X....n thx for offering to help too!
junkai for coming aft (soooooo) many times i called n persuaded u to come....yup but hope u haf the time to prac ur erhu there :)
lixiang for coming over aft ur work n showing support all the way>>>>
zhiyong for agreeing to come right in the first place....(u were the first hehe)
timo for coming over on the first night, den go home, den come on second day again....(normally when pple come and see the state of the camp they will siam the second day....)
andrew for helping to carry all the shit for the station games !!! (which in the end half of it we din use...) n realli sorry! for dumping u at the crossroad and shouting at u over the phone ...was damn bloody hell stressed at KRP tt day.thx!!!
n thx oso for making the balloons with the words "Thank You SSA".....
*pant* see so many to thank for the camp....
i sincerely thank the two seniors who came:
melvin: altho u r J8 (or J9???), n not in xianyue, u still showed support for the camp, including the scores for anjing, n coming for the first day, playing the icebreakers, practising wif us. i cant put the thanks in words...u are a great senior! do come back often n join in the activities!!! no matter wat, u r still part of HCCO, cos u haven forget that u are part of it....AND, i still owe u $7!! (i think)
liangsheng: ok mus say sorry first, (sori!), for screaming at u unreasonably jus few days before the camp (which was my ultra-high-stressed period). please understand...but realli thx for coming back n helping out....n asking about the camp every now and den. now tt i organise this camp, i feel wat u haf gone thru when u organised the alumni co...or at least part of it. mayb urs is a subset cos urs onli nid to contact hwachong pple....but mine haf to contact pple from other schools that i dun even noe....but in any case, thx for creating fun and laughter in the camp! (altho not ur type of fun n laughter! :) )
whoaa.....finally. to some of the pple that i appreciated alot for their help...
lan lao shi! aka mr lam. whom without which the Xianyue Camp 2005 would nv haf occurred!..haha shant say why here. cos he wouldnt be looking at this. but i stil rmb tt time nearing midnite, i called u while i was out on NEL...den when u suggested that place...suddenly my phone bat went flat! i was so panicky den....haf to wait until i rush home from mrt....den call u immediately once i stepped inside. den it was u who took quite some time to help me....yuppppz. it was sth to be remembered...
miss tan! as in, the teacher incharge for HCCO...yup i noe i bugged u ALOT for this xianyue camp...n ya i was asking too much i admit. both for the venue and for the overnight thing. realli soooori for the trouble i caused wif Mrs Chin n for taking up ur lessons time. thx for ur effort in making everything smooth for the camp....n for the advise n help that u gave. okok, wont bugged u again for no reason la! my chem teacher next year leh....
to the two who were two pillars of moral support for me during the organising of the camp:
vera (TJC): yup altho u were a substitute for the comm mems u proved more than that! appreciate the times when u called to discuss the camp ...n for finding the sponsors n writing to the organisations, introducing to them about our camp....n of informing 3 sec schools n ur own tjc school, n of publicising the camp until like to other schools that i dun even noe got co....den to ur frens too (yea u got realli alot of co contacts)...n thx esp for urging ur tj section mates to go!!! heard from weiyang wat u did la....i often wonder how one tt is not attending the camp n not previously involved in the camp can be so enthu n persistent in asking pple to come.....oh well. u r one exception.aniwae mus mus mus thank you for the moral support...err ya cos u somehow replace the SLs that were leaving one by one....n sori haf to trouble u wif the camp stuffs....arr. duno wat to say. jus thx!
dayang (my hcco senior!) hahahha. u were prob the first one whom i bitched about the Xianyue Camp. i rmb it was at beauty world? the Macs there. yups.yay thx for listening to me den! we tokked late into the night aft that pooling session rmb? (that time i thrash u ...) yea tt was the first ever i tokked about the xianyue camp in detail other than my family.hehe.thx for the listening ear! n of cos...thx for the utmost support all the way for the camp!!!!noe u were quite sad that bcos of army cant go for the camp...u noe when i was at my lowest, at the start of dec, when i was about to cancel the camp, i tot tt "nvm la, still got dayang will surely go one." haha. u were a buddha den lo.thx for encouraging me to go on at my hardest time....a v good companion!
n lastly, but mostly, to the four of u,whom without which the Xianyue Camp 2005 wouldnt haf been possible, literally:
my two frens cum helper cum camp-mates:
siu hon (nyjc): dude! alys so dudedy....yup u were the onli one left out of all the original 9 organisers, n i thank u for staying n helping out. more importantly, for being "alone" in the camp, for most of the participants are either from the same outside orch or same school or jc. u are realli the most out...dun mind me say. but haha u stayed on thru-out the 3 days, i duno how n why, but jus thx for transporting all the food, for lending ur gaohu (dragon head) n erhus, for copying fenpus, for tokking cok to me n weiyang, for insisting on helping out instead of having fun in the camp with the participants, for trying to cheer the whole mood up, the whole atmosphere up, for bon-ning me...for having fun with us, a bunch of strangers! esp for helping out in the station games....u noe...the hard work n such. for listening to wat i asked u to do during the camp, altho u haf no obligation to do so. alot bah...for informing too ur 4 section mates, for pulling in pple to come n help...mus say sori for ani mood swings that i had during the camp,n for ani rude things i said. cos again: i was stressed.haha.yup if got another time,dun mind being helpers with u again! n keep that xianyue spirit up for as long as u can!
weiyang(tjc): haha. i DIN expect u will help THAT much.haha. u din seemed that keen to help in the first place. but i was glad that u helped out. yea u were the excellent kitchen boy....all washing/making of bread/preparing of stuffs/ haha u auto will go do one.den got anithing will ask me if nid to do....woa realli thx alot for helping out! altho in the first place u werent even supposed to do anithing at all!....like i jus asked u whether u can helped out onli days before??? n haha thx for everything i haf said up there, plus esp the tokking cok sessions....n ya u are a bloody direct person cannot tahan hahaha.alrite n thx for urging me along during the camp to keep on to schedule when i was losing faith in everything...i guess everyone can see i was huh. but u keep asking me to go on to the next activities...haha my indecisiveness realli v bad ....okok. yup jus thx for being one of the lonely 3 pple doing all the hard work behind the camp!!!
yep hope all 3 of us can team up tgther again, this time to organise a v successful camp!
im gg to die....blardy tired!!....budden. on to the last two whom im eternally grateful for:
zhenming (our dear chairman of HCCO!): THX! i knew u were bloody tired, both physically and mentally. u were v stressed too. even during the camp, calls for appeals n such...u were v busy, yet u gave ur best for the camp! n i noe being a group leader is v hard,im jus grateful that u n zy can so successfully bring up the mood on the first day! not onli for this, but for the silent support that u gave me for the camp, both as a fren and as a section-mate, im sori that i cant discuss the details of the camp to u, partly bcos i din wan to trouble u, partly bcos there jus was too much to say!!n yea, ur support meant alot, n esp thx for understanding how i felt when nobody wana come for the camp, n nobody wana come for the concert. tis kind of thing, is not use mouth say say onli....can feel one.n u realli helped out bcos of ren qing....so...yup i owe u a big one.ur trouble wif current HCCO, got anithing tel me! i wil do the utmost i can....
zhengyou (my junior cum decessor):heheh.its realli an irony...that time when i was about to cancel the camp? the day b4 i wanted to call soka n cancel the venue...budden there was the stayover. n i tot, mayb somebody will change my mind? cos i wasnt 100% confirm tt i will cancel it, i was 95%. n the onli person that i tot of that could change my mind was u. n haha, u succeeded and the camp went on! altho it wasnt as wat i had expected, but thx so much for saving the camp! n of cos, not to mention the numerous night talks that we had, which would relate to the xianyue camp no matter wat (the clarke quay, the chinatown) yupsss. u were both a physical n moral support, for u helped in contacting pple (helped alot!) n ya dun think i dun appreciate it but jus that....haiz.guys are liddat.n i realise that, the lu zhengyou of sec 2 - 3 is quite diff from that of sec 4! haha.improvement indeed. both the mind n heart.u should noe wat i mean. ok mus say sorry here for yelling at u twice, once over the phone, the other on the 2nd day. both were stressed, sure u understand. but i jus dun wan u to haf an impression of me yelling jus bcos im stressed, i dun yell whenever im stressed. i yelled at u cos i needed somebody to hear me. budden. ya i guess its my fault that everything happened. felt quite bad aft i yelled on the 2nd day, cos u realli haf no responsibility watsoever in the camp, hell i onli asked u weeks before? or days. n ur group leader post is hard i noe, esp with so litt pple, n with the weak activities n planning from us organisers. u try to understand wat im gg thru, but hell, nobody can, so jus wana say thx for jus trying to understand...mayb when u haf gone thru all this, den u will noe? budden, u wouldn't haf to go thru all this, cos Xianyue Camp 2005 haf alr been organised and carried out.....thx for everything. from spending time to contact, to understand, to being a group leader, a fren, n a support. without u the flame of xianyue camp would haf been blown out a long time ago, but u reminded me of my past years in chsco....that youth who had guts. well. dare to think of the impossible, as i haf repeated so mani times.u asked me to storm out everything the night before the camp, to shout everytthing out...so that the next day during the camp, i would be the happy me, cos u dun wan to c a depressed or pissed me organising a camp rite? but in the end, i still did mood swings rite? i still wasnt able to compose myself enuff....n still stone around, still pull a sad face. well for all that u n zhenming haf been trying so hard to make pple laugh, here i am to make pple sad wif my pissed look. i dun blame u for blaming me. i blamed myself too.budden. yup.i haf learnt thru tis ...
i am tired. its 6.10am. i started typing at ....2am??? 4 hours!!! the longest post i ever write before!!!
the no. of "thx" and "!" in this post is far more than all those i haf used in my previous posts...
i haf given hell lot for this camp. thanks to those who took it.this will be the last time i give to Xianyue Camp 2005.from now on life will return back to normal for me, no pursuing of venues, no running to principal's office,no having to do proposals late at night alys at the back of my mind, no running to com lab to do proposals during lunch breaks, no walking aimlessly around home thinking of games to play, no staring into space and visualing how the camp will take place, no taking out of my small little black notebook to jot down ani ideas that came into my mind, no contacting of pple that i duno, no asking SLs when are they free for meetings, no perfecting my english in the parental consent forms, no having to stand up for all the camp costs, no breaking down bcos of the stress...
no Xianyue Camp. the out-of-the-place camp that no one noes.
or issit???....
Xianyue Camp 2006......anyone?
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