confession

heyy.

its alr some days aft the concert...guess life is returning back to normal for eveone now? these few days i haven realli been doing anithing else tho...eat sleep go out do some stuff, den eat n sleep again.

i sleep alot these few days. everytime i sleep, i will rmb tt nite tho.everytime i wake up, i wil ask myself, is it over?..evethg seems abit strange now to me..

i heard our whole concert.hehx honestly speaking din noe there were so mani mistakes.haha.but, its still our concert..the xianyue qizou was like -- erhu ganning so much! one part even tuo jie from banzou. haha. but no, we did a fine job! tts wat i think so, n wat alot other audiences think so too... high five! the xianyue sl of 02-03 batch was saying.."can hear tt u all haf alot of mo qi. all the erhu sounded like one playing (which is true! go hear the recording!). think its one of my fav items in the whole concert.." hahaha! was damn happy la! so many extra pracs were not redundant aft all...n all ur efforts are worth it! knew ALL of u put in alot of effor t in practising this qizou song...both j1s n j2s peeps. giv urself a pat on the shoulders! its wat onli hccoxyz peeps will noe about.... even u kaili! u oso put in alot of efforts in practising tis song, altho u din shang in the end, i think its realli the process that mattered...

erm. i think this is gg to be a long post...hehx.

as wat jinguan said, tis is my last concert. whether or not i will be up on stage again for ani other co performances, i realli dunno. but, it meant alot to me, n to all those that had oso viewed it as their last concert. i rmb the night before, jiankai was saying on the phone "eh, last concert leh, mus giv 100%!!" n tts y when i met him in the backstage n hugged him, i keep saying "100%, jiankai, 100%!!" mayb to the j1s n to some of the j2s, this concert may seem jus ani other concert, but trust me, the LAST one realli means sth....thinking back all those years which we haf all pulled through thick n thin together, esp my chsco peeps...yupp they were a great bunch of frens. n allow me to use this blog to thank all of them...

a very very long time ago, tis litt kid was introduced into the CO world. Following his brothers' footsteps, he joined school COs, and performed in so mani competitions and concerts n public performances....but most importantly, he found out alot abt himself n others around him through tis CCA, until finally, in JC, it has become more than a CCA to him. he din regret. it took up almost half of his life...hahaha...

mayb aft a few years, he might turn back n start a whole new CO journey? den it will be a brand new one. one which will create another impact in his life. or mayb, he would haf alr said goodbye to tis life.


hehx. i wana confess sth. tis xianyue is definitely one special xianyue to me.

i myself cannot explain y i felt anithing for tis section.i stil rmb last year april, i was stil running for the huang cheng exco...thinking that my path is somehow laid. my jc life. at tt time, i haf no seniors to consult. jc was like a totally new world to me, a world full of chances. i wanted sth diff in life. tts y i din join co in the first few months. i joined huang cheng. bcos it gave me sth different...aft i failed to get into HC exco, stupid me went to run for co exco. it was jus my luck that my batch had so few pple tt the whole batch was running for exco! at tt time, i was like...huh...

stil rmb the speech day last year...me n delin were late cos of some racial harmony thingy, when we got inside lt3, onli the central row of the lt was filled, and alot of peeps haf alr given their speech. at tt time i din noe ALOT of pple, basically onli the chs peeps, n those few in xianyue like minyi (which ponned the speech day ...) i was like ani one of u j1s now, even more blur den, duno ani pple, duno wat my jc life will be like, duno wat hcco is....n i jus stupidly ran for exco.haha. altho i performed in syf wif the co...hcco was stil like = nothing to me den. n den, when the results came out, i din noe tt my jc life had alr been set. tt im alr destined to work wif hcco peeps...n to do so many things later....

tt day when i knew i became xianyue sl....i did wat i haf done 2 years back when i became the student conductor of chsco. i asked myself wat i wanted to achieve wif tis post. wat i wanted to do. i stil rmb i asked myself "so wats the job of the xianyue sl?" ..i din haf the ans den.at the end of the bus ride (i was thinking on the bus)
i reached an ans. sth which alot of u might not be able to understand - "to make everyone smile in xianyue" ...i stil din noe wat it meant den...not until the last day, the very day of the concert, the very day that i leave tis post, den i understood tt i haf to add sth to the sentence - "to make everyone smile in xianyue AFT EVERYTHING"...becos there were so much conflicts through tis year in tis section (right?)..tt it jus isnt poss to make everyone smile everytime...but, if u can make everyone smile aft the concert...den wats there to regret?....

n den i started to haf dreams. dreams that i sometimes try to relate to my batchmates, esp those in xianyue. dreams that were so innocent, so far-fetched. onli to be pulled down so ruthlessly by reality itself. onli to realise that wat i wanted was not wat xianyue wanted. i realised tis onli 2 weeks b4 the concert... n yes zhengyou, tt was the truth that i realised.

tt nite that i tokked to lixiang, i told her i realised the truth alr, she asked me "wats the truth?" i said "that the day i tot i was the sl, i had alr failed as an sl." she said "y?" i ans "cos in the first place there was no sl-mem relationship in a section, there's onli pple in a section."....n she said its true. ironically it may seem, the day i tot i was the sl was the day tt i became sl...

its a hard truth tt i was prepared to accept. but there was one thing bugging me when i realised tis fact...n that is, if i haven done the things that i haf done, if i haven thought the things that i haf thought, will xianyue become xianyue now? or will everything be left unchanged? tts y, libo n zhengyou, tts y i asked both of u tt question tt nite 2 days before the concert aft our last prac. i was confused. "would u rather be one that do not make ani changes, or one that make changes but all the wrong ones?"..

n den, the night of the concert, when evebodi was buzzing around high n all, at dinnertime, i was still thinking...or sort of thinking. evethg was gg too fast for me to think, i jus din haf time... it was until dinnertime, tt i sat down wif libo, n i asked him sth which is not related to all tt i haf said, but yet seemed to relate alot ...."wat should i be thinking of when im playing the mengdie solo?"...he gave me an ans that i think i knew it alr deep within me. "think of all the things that u have done (in tis year in co n xianyue)"...it was still not enuff tho. not until zhengyou pulled me to a quiet corner outside the toilet jus before mengdie and said sth...that it hit me. i shant say wat he said to me, but wat he said was the key to evethg. it was like opening a lock to all the locks that i haf encountered.

n tts y i said during the sleepover, that i was kind of distracted during mengdie. ok i was fully distracted...dayang was v observant indeed. to me, mengdie was a symbol. it witnessed my batch's arrival in co, n witnessed my batch's departure. when i was playing bar 23, i was still thinking of how i first came to hccoxyz, n first took up gaohu, n played wif the seniors...tis v song, in syf 2005.how i was den someone inside tis team...den, i was there on stage, playing tis v song too, tis time wif so mani of my peers n juniors behind me, each of them coming to xianyue wif diff backgrounds, joining tis team...n i imagined how junkai had felt when he was shouxi, sitting at the v seat that he had sat before, n playing the v notes that he had played b4...n i noe, finally, that each one of us, had a different role to play. its not whether we make changes or not, its wat roles we play in tis section.no matter who u r in xianyue, u haf some role to play.trust me. EVERYONE makes a difference. its whether u recognise tis role or not. u may b tis someone in class, in church, at home, but in xianyue, u r tis SOMEONE.a role to play. whether u r some cute cute high pitched gal who alys zi high, or some deep-voiced guy who prefers to keep to himself, or some monkey who alys make funny faces n noises during dazu, or maomao, or someone who had alot to say but jus do not show it, or someone who cares alot how the concert was gg to be put up, or someone who sacrificed ur break time to prac...so mani diff roles. n as an sl, i haf my own role to play. n wif tt solo, i quietly shouted my role....did u all hear it?..

haiz. i think im jus recollecting sth that alr seem in the past.


i guess the xianyue camp is evidence of my wish to pull back the memories and let it stay. u may not believe it, but the idea of the camp actually originated from hccoxyz...even now i marvel at how i came up wif the idea, and worse, carried out the camp itself...for who? i ask....n no, zhengyou, i was wrong. it was not for myself, definitely not. i was confused den, confused whether i should carry on wif the camp or not. bcos i realised den, jus as i haf realised 2 weeks b4 the concert, that wat i wanted was not wat others wanted.

as i said b4, each batch of hccoxyz has a story left untold, a story that onli that batch will noe. we will nv noe the story of junkai's batch, n u j1s will nv noe the story of my batch. when u all become seniors, ur juniors will nv noe ur story too...its a cycle...but there is one thing in common throughout all the stories...that is, HCCOXYZ!

"And hence when the sun rises the next morning, a story is completed." hahahahha.u will haf to get to j2 to understand tis.

guess tis will be the last time i post tis kind of msg on tis blog?..hehx..so..mus take tis chance to dedicate msges.muaha.

to all the naughty and noisy j1s of hccoxyz 2006...
a very interesting batch realli...hahah.in terms of skills,i haf no worries realli. in terms of zi high, i haf no worries too! jus hope that every one of u will enjoy ur stay in hccoxyz and in hcco, no matter how much u will haf to go thru in the year ahead, dun give up!the world may be tt big, but where can u get 12 pple to come together wif no similarity at all save an erhu? n lend ur support to e nx sl, for if he or she realli cares abt the section, im sure he/she will nid it...

alrite a v v big thank you for the prezzies, the pillow n the small litt calender...i was like wow, din noe u all like sooo she bu de all of us seniors...muahahaha.hmm..reminds me of our batch last year...altho we haf half the no. of ur batch den.hehhxx.jiayou for syf 2007! for that will be ur last syf, n the end to ur school co life...awww.shouldnt be so pessimistic. jus jiayou!

ok im one darn bad sl cos i din do anithing at all for u all for the concert, so, might as well say wat i wanted to say all along to all of u, except that now evethg will be read by others -_-...

(in order of calender appearance)...

wenqi: self-high gal tt haf immense potential in being TOO passionate or emotional about sth! stil rmb times when u were always the earliest for pracs...den u will see me n say "sl! c im so enthu, im the earliest!" den i will giv u THE weird look...muahaha. cont to be the earliest den! hope ur passion wont die cos u din get into interview round n hence hccoexco...mus help the nx xianyue sl ok! (dun giv him/her dao looks like u used to giv me during xiaozu...hahaha.)n contribute as much as poss, altho i noe its hard, but wif ur capability its nth much. hehx. jc is v diff from ani other form of school life, in jc its like the more u r enthu, the less happiness u get. haha. but the question is: does that mean we should not be enthu?? sometimes u nid to put down some things in life and carry on....one thing is for certain tho, i din regret calling u to join hcco! :)

jasline: yes u, u were the one that i haf a v bad impression of at first! ponning co prac stil haf the cheek to call n tell me!! hahaha. budden, in the end i let u choose right? n in the following pracs, u din pon at all! *clap clap clap*...guess its ur choice that matters the most. cont adding fun to xianyue in ur own way!...as i say, everyone has their own role, find urs soon!...n take care of wenqi when she's down k (which i expect she would be....haha)u cant expect yuhao to go up n ask wenqi "are you ok?"...(hor yuhao?)...n cont bullying maomao as much as u can! jiayou! :)

siheng: ahh, u r one who haf alot of other commitments..hmm tts y i din realli acknowledge ur efforts in coming hcco prac u see.haha. but rest assured i noe u tried v hard alr...so dun nid say sorry la! ur efforts can be seen so easily by how u are able to catch up despite missing some pracs....cont being urself!..dun feel dejected about stuffs that are out of ur frequency...n may hccoxyz bring fond memories to u!who knows, mayb the team u r searching for is jus right in front of u...n rmb, u r one of the 12!

ruihong: er ya. u noe i felt kind of sori aft i sort of reprimanded u n hongfei tt time? about the sabbaticals thingy. yea. but hell, i haf no doubt abt ur enthuness now la, so keep it up! wont b around animore so do less funny faces during dazu, and focus more on wei lao shi! (hehx). IF hongfei wana pon again (IF)...psycho him back k! n, haha, yup we shall all leave the burden of syf to every single one of u...but, i think wats most impt is not the results, but how all of u achieved the results! enjoy ur first n final stay in hccoxyz!

junzhi: ahh, another one who dun show wat u r supposed to show. i would nv forget u r the first junior who posted 3 consecutive posts in tis v blog at the start of the year! think u wont drop ur enthusiasm so fast rite???...dun hesitate to make xianyue fun in ur own way! think u haf learnt alot thru tis co? or am i mistaken....but, no matter wat, miracles dun happen jus liddat, dun think, jus do it!

kaili: ehh.yup..honestly i was thinking back den how to make a perfect 20 in xianyue for the concert...den heard from sylvia about u! ahhaha! sure din regret asking u to join...first time u c me i c u but we din recognise each other! i was wondering who was tt gal peeping into xianyue classroom...den when i call u...tada!...it hit me la! haha but let that be ur special entry to hccoxyz...n be more confident about ur skills...yes, more confident! here mus say sorry tt time at pld err i din realli wan to tok , so mayb i appeared kind of weird??hahaha.but its alrite im always weird hehx. beware of dayang!!! muahahah.n yup show the auntie side of u to xianyue instead of onli dayang la...haha.i no doubt u can crap more than anione in the section! n lastly, thx for putting up ur best for the concert!! me n others may not noe how much u haf practised ur parts despite the lack of time(u started onli one month b4 the concert!), joining in late, having to attend 2ndintakers remedial lessons, lep camp...despite all these, u stil make it in the end!!

sutyee: ok actually i confess i din how come u joined onli 3 months later altho u were in hwachong.hahaha.think somebodi psychoed u right?? but watever, u r in the section now! think its not easy for u (n minyi hehx) to be included cos of diff sec sch ya?i was like...shit if she ostra herself i oso cant do anithing...but in the end, haha! i no worries now le. cont being "feng" as much as u can in co!!...(sure u can do it wif THIS batch of peeps...) n yea, hope u will haf a fun-filled year wif these crazy frens..haha!oh, n thx for being a guai1 member, u were one of the few whom i realli dun nid to worry about ...

yuhao: you!! i got my reason when i alys say u gan ...cos u haf immense potential in ganning! niwae, can c ur improvement in attitude la...hahaha....like the first time say "can i pon co? cos got alot of homework, nid to go home do." i was like......obviously u were lacking some enthusiasm den! haha...but aftwards, got come for prac more frequently n more willingly, stil rmb got one time u were stuck at the chs side cos of the rain, den call me to bring umbrella to fetch u (which i conveniently forgot...sry!) den in the end u ran back...ahhaha! think u can help the next sl v much too...so dun be so quiet during sectionals la! open up more!!! syf 2007...gogogo!

sylvia: do u noe that u realli realli CAN pissed me off sometimes??? wif ur pessimistic words la...haha.esp during my stress period...like when u walked up to me n say "concert is not gg to make it" or sth liddat. hahhaha. but nahz, its alrite now la, jus cos i was stressed abt the concert den so i easily get pissed when pple say the er 'wrong' things. haha ok i admit im a damn inefficient sl sometimes, if not alot of times, hehx but u wont be seeing me ard alr!!...but realli, thx for doing ur best for the concert too, despite all the TAG n stuffs,know u got quite a busy life...n despite knowing tt time is very very short, u still tried! oh, sth to say here.sec sch is v diff frm jc, huangcheng is v diff frm co, n j1 is v diff frm j2. yup. hope u will learnt all these by the end of nx year? as for xianyue, i duno how much u haf gone thru wif all ur frens in the past, but, i oso duno how much u will go thru wif tis section in the coming year.so i say, giv it a try!! n may passion outweigh logic!

zhengyou: u, haha, duno wat to say realli. so mani things to say, cant possibly say evethg.at the start when u joined xianyue aft huang cheng, ur heart wont here at all.realli. i can see it so clearly...u din realli admit tt u were one of us. i was even wondering whether or not to kick u out of the section wif ur attitude den...cos i din wan THAT zhengyou to be wif xianyue, or rather, i dun wan zhengyou to be here n there at the same time.but gradually...ur presence is felt...u said u tried v hard, u even came aft the salsa dance thingy, u said u will try to conc on concert...n den, aft all tt, u WERE wif us. if i haf ani doubts before the concert, i don haf any aft it. now xianyue has a place for u, n u haf a place for xianyue.haha...it isnt easy i noe...but, jus cos i din show my appreciation, doesnt mean i dun appreciate right?...in the end, its u who benefits, n not me.so whether or not u will stay wif us den, its ur choice, n you made it! so now, its another tough choice for u to do, n u noe wats it....u noe how hard it is to say goodbye, but did u noe how hard it is to say hi? make ur choice wisely...but nevertheless, thx for adding ur hairy fun to xianyue!concert might haf ended...paths might haf separated...time might haf passed...but be glad that u haf created inerasable memories in tis section, and left ur hairy footprint in hccoxyz!

hongfei: hahahahhahahahha.ok.counselling sessions wif u were.....damn tiring!!! realli la, my brain was chao da each time aft i speak wif u for loong hours. but i din regret, esp wat i c aft the concert. honestly, i had alot of qi wang on u at the start of the year, but somehow u know how to disappoint pple...haha....but somehow u get it....tt day aft pre-u seminar camp, i was damn worried la, u din come while sinhwee n shupeng came....so i tot evethg was lost le...den u came aftwards, hair messy n eyes black black.haha. tt sight was moving for me realli.wat i wan to say is, pple's impression doesnt matter, its ur impression of u that matters most. bcos - "i think therefore i am" :)...dun escape from urself, accept!! hahah tis sounds like another counselling ... n im sure u will rmb wat we haf said la...carry tis wif u to nx year's syf! im sure i wont c mr hongfei being ostra while evebodi is cheering at nx year's syf...jiayou! n rmb, u r in xianyue!

kaiying: uh-huhh, another one who blatantly call me n say "can i pon co later? i wana go boarding school n sleep...i v tired.." -_-...den i stil haf to giv u discount in the end let u pon xiaozu but attend dazu...hahaha.but, i bet u wont do tis for the coming year rite?? cos u can be realli enthu when u wan! (like the tipco paint banner day, when u came back aft xu lao to paint when evebodi has alr went home...jiankai keep saying "chao enthu la!"...hahaha!)...keep it up! n once again...dun tear jus b4 the xianyue item in the future if there are ani...im sure ur sl den will be damn scared n worried la!....haf confidence!!!! n rmb tt msg about the erhu 2 thingy? hope u din interpret it wrongly, n hope u alr noe y i did that now aft the concert...hehx.yeaa noe ur boarding sch rules quite strict n got curfew...but u wont miss out on the fun jus cos of these right?? niwae, in the future, if u duno who to look for when u stressed or wat...mayb u can...jus mayb...look for tis section!

**shupeng: hahahahah! wonder y i write u in too? hehx wat m i toking u may not even be seeing tis...but aniwae, i did reconsider asking u to join back xianyue back in the hols, but seeing ur enthusiasm n progress in daji skills...i thought otherwise! haha, mayb its fate itself ba, for u to be in daji, but u haf realli improved alot in daji!i haf no doubt tt u will work hard for syf nx year, for hcco! i seriously wonder how evethg will turn out if u joined hccoxyz...but den, i osos seriously wonder how evethg will turn out if u DIN join hccodaji!! jiayou!

something tells me this is yet another beginning of .....hmm....haf fun juniors!

to all my batchmates who haf slugged thru all the sian-ness and fun of hcco....
wahh.so fast yet so slow that the concert is over. seriously we wont a v bonded batch la, but, thru tis concert, i think every one of us put in our 100%!! n when all of us worked towards the same goal....it will most definitely be a success! n it was!
n i realli think we are a damn lucky batch, got good good seniors who come back to watch the concert n giv prezzies somemore! n got good good juniors who made nice thoughtful gifts for all of us!
since tis may prob be the last time i say sth so rou ma, i shall say as rou ma as poss! if cannot tahan turn ard n puke k, but mus turn back again n read finish!

alice: heyy! until now i realli duno why u joined back co n performed for the concert leh...mayb some day u can enlighten me? realli...but, if at the backstage wont enough, here's another thanks for joining us! hope ur brief stay tis year in xianyue had opened up another chapter in ur life...thx for working n practising hard for the concert, despite the lack of time, think u praced alot harder than alot of us...n as u will prob know, the juniors all love u!! so auntie in future mus come back for qing gong yan n stuffs k...n realli, u joined hccoxyz before me, n before alot of peeps...so u had all along been in tis section (i was wrong la k, sorieee..) oh n i still cannot believe that u r a libra!!! u n me....no link!! (except we r both in hccoxyz :) )

sharon: ookk. REALLI din expect u to erm...jus liddat. budden, ok la haf to accept in the end. despite all the fun n laughter that we all had in xianyue last year....oh i particularly rmb tis one time, straight aft the promos bio spa paper, u msg me say "organise more outings!" sth liddat...at tt time i was ---- wahh so enthu! hahhaha.in the end not even one outing was organised....(except tt one time that i NEARLY splashed the "cake" on you....)but oh well, hope u haf enjoyed ur stay in hcco n hccoxyz? yeaaa we all noe u love dhsco v much...tts y we all appreciated it when u join us for evethg even when hcco was like damn sianed at tt time...yeaa esp those trips aft ur canoe trainings all the way back to sch...ermm altho in e end u onli played a few notes den dazu end alr, but wats most impt is ur presence was felt! ok think saying all tis onli now is a bit outdated liaoz, but, me sure u wont forget those times wif the seniors...the stayovers, the "mini" outings, the chem lects, wahh now i think of it, there WERE so much ...but too bad that it will remain a were forever... dun EVER feel left out in hccoxyz k! cos the story of hccoxyz 05-06 will nv be completed without u!

felicia: oook jus like evebodi said, u r like a big sister la! to the section i mean.haha.like stil rmb tt time about the xiaozu not efficient thingy, u said u were about to msg me say sori altho u dun feel sori at all...i was like -_-...hhahaha.thanks for helping xianyue all along! got one time i think when evebodi was quite low...u keep highing wif ur jumpy movements! yea n u r prob the one who stays wif the juniors the most (cos 4 got chem s, me n bong always not around) so thx for taking charge n all! n sorry...cos i was wrong...that time about the xiaozu thingy? i said "i think nobodi here thinks more about the section other than me.." i think i was too self-centered. think all of u cared alot about the section..jus tt dumb me din open my eyes n c. so...sori!...n altho ur homeland is erm..further away, but hope tis section had created some beautiful memories for u to keep...rmb tt time some of us sent u off at the airport? mayb we can do tt again (hehx!) at the end of the year...but tis time wif the full hccoxyz! dun miss us!

enqi: heyy! i haf to say thx first for letting in n playing gaohu altho u dun feel like it!! i realli appreciated tt...like hell nobodi wana plays gaohu bside me!!! :( but yupp, thx for "sacrificing", n for practising hard for the concert despite all ur studies n committment....realli hope u had enjoyed joining hcco?..rmb tt time when i was asking u on msn, den u were like "unless somebodi from nyco join den i join..." wahh -- but heng in the end both u n felicia joined! mayb u haf missed out on the fun wif the seniors, but u def. din miss out on the ones wif the juniors! did u noe u were at one time a sort of saviour for all of us? cos tt time seniors jus left, den left onli a few pple....ur joining xyz is realli a refreshing change for all of us! n hope too....oh i forgot to add. thanks for trying to relieve my stress when i was stressed...rmb tt msg aft i sort of throw my temper at u all about the xiaozu thingy? ur reply was realli REALLI encouraging....hehx. i think i would haf died of guilt tt nite, if u n felicia haven replied.haha...thx for evethg!

jinguan: heyy dude...well, wat can i say? y is there onli two years of jc life?...i feel that i haf onli started to noe u...n so does eveone else? some dun even know u at all....a pity, realli. not until the last day of the concert, did i finally c that another side of u..hahaa...another irony indeed. thanks. thanks for caring for xianyue all along...i duno how n why u did it, but jus - thanks! rest assured that i hear ur voice even when it was at the lowest...rest assured that at least someone in xianyue heard it! a v big sorry here to you, for sometimes neglecting how u felt wif my actions, n for doing sth tt opposes what u call "right". did i mention b4? there's one thing in u tt im damn impressed about, that is, u r u, jinguan is jinguan. i know u wil nv understand tis, but someday, when ningfei is ningfei, den mayb u will understand? hahaha...leave with no regrets i should say, leave, like me, wif the comfort of knowing that we haf a bunch of great juniors! and tt there will be tis another jinguan in xianyue, showering care altho he doesnt show it!

libo: dotz. out of the original 5 (+ zhenming) soccer gang in sec 1, u were the onli 1 left wif me in my last sch co concert.haha. n ur last too i supposed. well, i think i said tis to u b4....my best memories in co, were the ones in sec 1, where evethg is so bloody innocent den! yup the 6 of us den...so i say, that u rep part of my lost memories...hm.alrite i wont say abt the sec sch co life le...but, since last year we haf gone thru quite alot too rite? whether it is thru all the prezzie-making, to the "stone" incident, to all the mugging for promos n stuff...tt time when i was damn lonely cos err, the other j2s were not that enthu.....u were the onli one left that i can tok wif la. so ..thanks! u def. not the type that shows emotions one la, but, i guess the encouragement n stuffs at the backstage during the concert sums all our co life tgther up..right? at least i can safely say we both feel sth for tis hccoxyz...n may u realise ur dreams in life! who noes, mayb some day i might call u again n say..."lets haf a xianyue stayover!"....n when tt time comes, hope u wil rmb those days that u had wif hccoxyz...dun forget!

minyi: heyy! hmm...u ar...(i would say tis again) definitely a v v v MAFAN gal!!! wif all those fights n arguments about small litt minor things like *&^%$#@! n duno wat else....hahhahaha. okkk. actually, i REALLI v sian-ed diao everytime u argue wif me in front of the section....its like, here goes again, we both noe that we wont step down from our stand!! sooo, haizz, almost everytime i haf to soften down n be the grand loserr...but nvm! hahaha. its part n parcel la...n ur suggestions werent tt warped actually hehx.k in future wont be playing again tgther in a co alr..happy not? think its ur greatest wish hurz.i think its all .... linked. 2 years ago, when we first tokked on msn, who would haf tot that u n i will be joining hccoxyz? ...mayb u sort of knew it, but i sure din. n den, its like such a swift journey ya? sometimes feel as if we are frens, but most of the times feel we are strangers...yea? sure u wil agree de...but, thanks! thanks for shouting at me face to face when u bu shuang me, thanks for arguing wif me non-stop on msn when u dun agree wif me, thanks for pointing out my mistakes in front of the whole section,thanks, for gg thru all that u haf gone thru in xianyue! u haf been a part of tis section, that i can assure you. no matter how lonely u felt sometimes here, whether isit last year, or tis year, im sure deep inside u, u know that eveone cares about u right?hahahahhaha.n im sure deep inside all of us, we oso noe that u care ALOT about the section ....right??? haha. i dun nid to be ningfei to know that...hehx.thx for including urself in tis section even in hard times...jus hoped that u haf found ur role in xianyue..n tt xianyue has founded sth in u. think about it. n may joy and laughter in xianyue wash away any grief or fear that u haf...mayb, jus mayb, 2 years later, we might tokked on msn again, and - tada! we would be playing in the same co yet again!..den, i hope u will turn out to be yet another stranger...

zhenming: bong! mr president of hcco!! well well, in hcco can say i go thru alot wif u, much more than in tchsco guarantee...wat is done is done, there's nth further for me to say. times that were good, times that were bad, times that i was bushuang, times that u were bushuang, times that we had same views (psychoing liang cheng), times that our opinions differed....those were nth, i realise, for the last day, at the backstage, i realise wats impt is the concert, the concert that all of us, esp both of us, haf been working to, since last year when we get elected, our paths haf alr been tightly sealed tgther for tis year...onli to be separated wif the end of the concert...i shall leave all the sadness behind now, bcos, the concert was a success! n i think, for duno wat reason, that it would haf been, no matter how we slugged thru this year! i seriously think, onli u n i will noe how much "sacrifice" means...how much hcco will mean to both of us.in the future, there might not be ani one thing that is common btw us, n our paths thus drift...but we can always search back our own paths, n reach the junction where our days of hcco will again appear in front of us, den mayb, we would yearn for that kind of life again....its amazing how we pulled thru, but its even more amazing how we fell so many times and stand up again n again....good job pres! im sure huang zhong da lv will always remain a part of u! three cheers for hcco!

here's to two seniors who had spent time in joining the concert wif us...

dayang: haizz. u ar...hahahahahah. yea noe u desperately want to capture the memories, but like i said, sometimes jus haf to learn to let go....well,i think u haf alr gotten wat im trying to say all tis while, jus a thx! for being wif hccoxyz all along. mayb some day, u might find ur true love...hahahaha. smile! u r our senior!

liangsheng: heyy u!!! haven realli hao hao de speak wif u....jus wan to thank you...for the concert thingy...n congratulate u for attaining enlightenment? hahahaha.mengdie wasnt tt hard to comprehend i supposed? but realli, i din noe u wil do tt, esp when it was ur last concert...i supposed it was quite hard for u to decide den? but, i think ur last concert had alr been a v v long time ago....at my bro's time. yuppz. hehx but nevertheless, u will forever be remembered as the ancient senior of hccoxyz! jiayou for ur future endeavors!!

to the seniors, hccoxyz 04-05, whom once upon a time we had so much fun with...
hmm. how to say. i seriously duno how all ur xianyue days were last time...but realli, thx for gg crazy wif us last year!! u were the ones who showed me that in jc, there can be loads of fun!! no doubt all ur lives are separated now, but, hope from time to time u all will come back at least to tis blog n leave ur precious footprint somewhere....to remind us tt our seniors are stil here!! omg...i jus realised tt we are all gg to be like all of u in half a year's time!!! nx year, it will be our turn to sit with all of u (i hope) n watch our juniors perform in syf....n den nx nx year..the concert....den nx nx nx year....soon u all will be called great great seniors le! hccoxyz forever! (thx for the prezzies!n coming back to watch us!)

FINALLY!!! i found out tt i haf so bloody hell alot to say to everyone la.but hell, no time n no space le. it was a torturous process btw...but hell i enjoyed tis torture!! err i think i mus congratulate myself for posting the longest ever post on hccoxyz blog history!!! well, IF u haf read thru all tt without missing one word, tell me ok!! i promise i will treat u someday...promise!!

okok.ending off now la.shit im damn luosuo...jus a final para b4 i wake up tml morn n dig into my mugging hole...

i was gg to recount wat i haf gone thru wif hccoxyz for tis past year. but i stoned for a few seconds...n i cant think of anithing!! i guess wat i haf experienced is already partially shown in the words up there, oh well, let the other half of it be buried in the minds n hearts of respective pple reading tis blog, for i couldnt haf experienced all tt alone! nx year i will be clean shaven over the head, n when i come back everything will surely be different! hard to imagine that nx nx year those 12 juniors would be sitting beside me n watching our juniors' concert....den nx nx nx nx year??? oh man, i think ten years later, when the whole hccoxyz family come stomping into SCH (if by that time still SCH) den, the tickets head mus reserve a whole block for all of us!! hahahahha! shuang man!! ok i think im brain dead alr.

but seriously, how many years will it take for me to erase the memories that i had here? lets jus hope that 1 day in a far far land, when ani two of us meet unexpectedly, den the memories shall be revived....

hccoxyz!

Ning Fei